I just came back from an amazing vacation traveling cross country with Rose @disenchantedcreations and her son, Malachai (3), and my son Malakai (2.5.) She had made the trip to New York six months prior and was inspired to begin a van life adventure. I’m also very drawn to the road so after a month of planning we came up with a sort of solid idea for our trip, with our final destination being Bernett, Texas for the Texas Eclipse 5/8/24 and the Texas Eclipse Festival. Most people probably would not have been comfortable with the loose plans we had had time to discuss and the looooong drive ahead, but we did not mind. We had four days to get to Texas from Humboldt County to be in time for the festivities. Nothing could stop us. 

We packed up the van with car-camping supplies; stove, pot, pan, utensils, flashlights, floaties for the lake, propane, soap, sponge, and dishrag. Clothing for us and the kids; including diapers, cosmetics, and swimwear. Toys for us and the kids; coloring books, flow toys, toy cars, beads and tools, bingo, tablets. We also brought a children’s potty, mattress/bedding, jumper cables, and bungee cords. We used yellow totes to hold up the mattress and a few rectangular storage containers to go along the sides. At the back(trunk) was a large cloth container that contained toiletries, easy-to-access alcohol, snacks, and eating utensils. The mattress folded in at the back so the car seats fit perfectly in the middle aisle with the cooler in between the two (with enough room for the kids to look over at each other.) It took both of us to close the trunk every time it was opened, because the memory foam mattress stuck out about a foot. To say the least, the car was stuffed to the point of almost bursting, but being together with the kids on a wild adventure made it all worth it.

Malachi began the trip with “My best friend Malakai.” 

You would think two toddlers would ring each other’s necks after an hour in the car in a tight space, but that wasn’t the case at all! We started at night and drove from Humboldt to Calaveras arriving at a friend’s house. This stop wasn’t on the way but the comfort and joy of seeing friends who don’t live close by began our trip on an upbeat note. The kids played in the blacklight lit art space till the wee hours of the morning until we put We’re Back: Land Before Time onto the projector and cuddled up on the couch. We knew we’d have to leave at a decent time in the morning and our time together was short, so we sucked up the time together in exchange for sleep. 

The next morning the kids took their wizzes (Malachi is potty trained but Malakai is still learning) and we hopped in the car and continued our adventure. We made a pact that we would not eat fast food on this trip (the go-to for people on the road.) And this proved easy to carry out because neither of us likes fast food and we both love salads!! So we stopped at a grocery store and got an item and drink for everyone. We did not want to overfill the car with food that would go bad so buying small portions was important to us. Also, buying fruit was a must. We had a never ending supply of grapes to snack on in the middle console. 

We drove to Barstow where we would make the sharp east turn toward Nevada. We stopped for Mexican Food and sat at the table for a much-needed rest. Rose and I would split our meals when we ate out, exploring each other’s likes and finding a middle ground between our dislikes. After, we hiked along the Pacific Coast Trail along the freeway. The sun was setting behind the mountain tops and I carried my son who was exhausted from the night prior. We found a metal box with a log and hand sanitizer along with many hidden cartons of water.

Back in the car, we drove into Nevada, just barely missing a friend I wanted to visit and hit a truck stop in Arizona. The truck stop was full of floodlights, and even though I considered parking between two trucks we decided to park up a road past the truck stop on top of a hill that overlooked the street. Rose was ultimately worried this first night that illegally camping on mountain tops would bother me. After the first night she knew she didn’t have to worry about my roadsleep morals. We unpacked the car seats, left them outside and placed all the other backpacks and bags on top of the bed into the front seat. The first time we did this it must have taken 30-40 minutes but with time this unpacking would go faster and faster.

We had a night of not being bothered. Sleeping very close to the ceiling of the van would seem claustrophobic but it wasn’t. We enjoyed the baby snuggles and having this time together. We packed up the car in the morning and continued to drive. It was around this time that Rose would take morning shifts and I would take night shifts, exchanging throughout the day if necessary. We drove 8.5-hour days on the way there. Stopping for an hour’s walk along the way. There was very little disagreeing and the kids were pampered by the mother not driving. 

Getting into Texas we were excited for the Texas Eclipse Festival. We slept on a dirt road that night, which we figured was surrounded by farmland. We were awoken at 5 am by a man whom we begged for forgiveness and told him we would move on. He kinda laughed at us in our PJs puddled together in the car with our kids. We picked up some food that day for the weekend and checked the tire pressure, then we were ready to go into the event. The kids kept saying “Party! Party!” When we pulled up there was a line but it was moving steadily. Rose jumped out of the car and tried to hustle a ‘Family Car Camping Pass’ but the line was moving too quickly, we almost lost her. Security waved us right through not opening a door or luggage. Finding a camping spot was hard. By Friday everyone was already camping on top of one another. We had to squeeze ourselves in to fit. We did push our way into the extended family camping, we thought this was important that we were around other kids and not a bunch of wooks. After all, we are bringing our toddlers into a 40,000-person rave, it would be nice to have a safer campsite to go back to. While we were setting up camp there was no room for the pop-up, so we had to makeshift the pop-up on top of the car and utilize the little bit of space around us to put our kitchen and chairs. We immediately made friends with the people around us. A single mom was camping next to us with two children, one a toddler, and the kids hit it off and played as we settled in. Within the first hour of arrival, someone gifted us glamping passes (no we did not think to move camp) which offered us unlimited showers. This was a big win because the Browners station had a big crowd and a long line, which would have surely overstimulated my Malakai. The showers ultimately helped with our children’s cleanliness and breathing which by the end of the festival, I was concerned about Malakai’s hack. 

We went out together on Friday, bringing the kids in my wagon that had wheels meant for the dirt. Right at arrival we were surrounded by young rave girls and wooked out men who gushed over our “rave babies” offering them kandy bracelets and stickers. The kids were already covered in dirt and wide-eyed. My Malakai kept trying to jump out of the wagon and was hard to keep up with. Our neighbor turned around at the top of the hill as we continued to trudge our way in. It was a very large map and the stages were incredible, art installations all along the way, pop-up tents with astronomy studies, food trucks, and art galleries. The foot traffic picked up and my Malakai would not wear his ear muffs or come when called by name. I had to call it a night as soon as the night began, while the other Malachi danced away at the sun stage, soaking it all in. 

By the time Rose came back, we traded spots, and I was able to go out while she slept with the kids. I roamed around really taking an interest in the art and the tea lounge which had live music and multiple tea-serving spaces. 

The next day we did this routine again, feeding the kids, walking into the festival together, and taking the kids in the wagon. I enjoyed dancing to the Desert Hearts Takeover and Malachi passed out resin gifts his mother crafted to everyone he could. While my Malakai spent his time napping in the wagon. At night I was able to see my favorite DJ Ahee and reconnect with my Triptych community.

It is different going to the festival with kids. There was a lot less partying with friends and more focus on the children, but that was okay. We’re exposing our kids to an environment they may very well seek later in life and showing them that they can make connections not on drugs and enjoy the festival from the eyes of a child. After all, children can easily be compared to an adult on L or mushrooms if you think about it. 

On Sunday we went to the quarry and swam in the lake. My Malakai hadn’t done much swimming before that. He wouldn’t let go of me but also didn’t want to get out. These silly memories are so precious. When we towel-dried off there was a group next to us. I gave the three of them Tarot readings and they looked up at me wide-eyed in awe. Malakai walked around picking up rocks and throwing them as I watched to make sure they didn’t hit anyone around us. The hecklers encouraged Malakai’s naughty behavior. 

Malakai and I also got some alone time at one point. We danced at kids’ camp, climbed the rickety structure, and went into the dome where a piano player played a gentle heart-lifting tune while images of astrology signs were projected against the ceiling. Malakai laid on me, surrounded by community, while looking up and cooing at the designs. Holding him in my arms I was okay with missing the psychedelic speeches, the yoga sessions, and the crowded stages. This was a time for us to be together, I no longer needed to go find the next thing, my thing was right here sitting in my lap. 

Exodus on Monday morning was not expected and shocking. It was so abrupt I couldn’t think. “Tornado warning, everyone must leave!” And only hours before the eclipse. We packed up the car and debated meeting up with our friends who we hardly had any time with or some we hadn’t seen at all. But once we were in the car we were pushed out of the festival in the forever moving line on the way out. Were we going to risk the chance of being caught in a tornado with the kids? Without the kids, you’d have to drag me out of the party but with the kids… We were already on an adventure, us being together was the adventure. So fuck it, we moved on!

Outside of the venue we stopped at a gas station and found a tornado shelter (I would not have known what this was if Rose hadn’t told me) to sit on top of with the children. There were lots of festival-goers around us. We took out our glasses, popped a bottle of mead and cheered! The energy of the eclipse was heavy. We were told that animals (and children) might act strange. Malakai was fascinated with the moon, “the moon, the moon” he would say as I held his glasses and he pointed at the sky. It was all rather lovely but then the moon started traveling to the left of the sun and yes my Malakai began to misbehave, sliding down the storm drain and running around in the brush. I sat him in the car almost in tears. Was it because we left the festival frantically? Was it the eclipse? Was it the feeling of lacking the festival experience because I brought my kid? Or was it self-hatred, uncertainty? But that’s what it brought on. I sat in the car for a minute and self-reflected. It would be a long drive after this. It was time to recollect. 

We stayed the night near a lake on our way to White Sand. We set up our table after putting the kids to bed. We drank and beaded rave bracelets even though it was post-party. I made a handful for my family to give out when I got home. In the morning it was so beautiful waking up parked next to the water. Maybe van life is for me. The car next to us, even though we were hours away from Bernett, had also attended the festival. The gentleman was from San Francisco and considered himself an eclipse chaser. He was so kind and friendly, another reminder of the eclectic types of people that the festival scene draws in. He also moped for us when we left, finding some of the kid’s toys and sending me a text to pick them up from San Francisco the next time I visited. 

We continued on our adventure. Driving and hiking, and staying in a hotel one night for a much-needed shower and to indulge in the pool. We hiked Pyramid Mountain, and up in the snow of New Mexico. We searched for caves and found a wonderful quiet and free camping spot in the woods. We never once paid for our van camping spot outside of the festival. On the second to last day of our trip a strap was loose on the roof of the car and no matter how many things we rearranged we could not make the loud obnoxious rattling go away. This is when things became tense and we adults began to grow frustrated and butted heads. Once we pulled over safely and were able to fix the problem we came back to our senses and were able to discuss what the issue was and how to respond better next time. A big part of traveling is communication. In a small space, both parties need to admit faults and grow from the experience. It’s a utopia to believe you can get along with your road dog 100% of the time.

But, I’m proud to say we got along 95% of the time through positive reinforcement, sharing responsibilities, and strong communication. 

The last night we were around Santa Rosa, 4 hours away from home and it was time to sleep. We drove 30-45 minutes off the freeway past neighborhoods and as close to a hiking trail as we could get. We unpacked the car close to midnight and as soon as we closed our eyes the rain began to pour. I couldn’t help but stress in my head that the car seats were soaking up outside. In the morning I jumped out of bed and started getting things ready. We took off the car seat covers and put them in a bag. We covered the seats in blankets and repacked the car at our fastest speed, 20 minutes. It wasn’t nearly that bad. 

We ended our trip with a wonderful breakfast. I am so thankful to have spent this time with my friend Rose and her Malachi. I have done a handful of camping trips with my children and a few festivals with my oldest when she was as young as five but never have I ever taken my toddler to what can easily be considered a massive that took us through four states to get to. I am so gracious that Rose was willing to share this experience with me and that she had a nag for hiking, healthy food, and in-depth conversations. This was truly a magical experience and I encourage all families to take the plunge and travel the world outside of their comfort zone. 

Cheers.