The Empathic Processing of Noelle Cox

Noelle Cox, Portrait

Natascha: This is Natascha with the Little Lost Forest blog. Today I will be interviewing Noelle Cox, a local Eureka legend who specializes in oil paints, gold leaf, and customized frames. Noel Cox showcased her exhibit Underneath the Surface at Morris Graves in January 2024. Noel takes a surreal and abstract approach to local animals. Fantasized creatures, glorified bugs, and self-portraits. In her sci-fi paintings, a dark humor lingers in the foreground as each piece is staged with class and elegance. It’s September 7th, around 5:00, and we’re sitting down together in her home studio. 

Natascha: Hi, Noel. How are you doing today? 

Noelle: I’m okay. I’m good. It’s good to have you. 

Natascha: Thanks for having me. 

Noelle: Thank you for having an interview with me. 

Natascha: I was very excited all the way up to this point. So thank you so much for sitting with me. 

How old were you when you started seeing yourself as an artist? 

Noelle: Well, I think it was kind of gradual, but I think that I really got serious when I was about 16. I painted my first oil painting. Yeah, but I would draw, you know, I took it very seriously, actually. It was something I could do by myself that I could feel sacred about. 

Natascha: And what was the oil painting of? 

Noelle: It was kind of dark. It was a dead lady. With strings attached to it in the night sky. 

Natascha: And how did it make you feel when you saw the finished piece? 

Noelle: I wasn’t quite, you know, what do you call it? Satisfied with it. But when I look at it/ when I looked at it, I was like, wow, okay, This is kind of how I feel, you know? 

Natascha: From what I understood, your father just passed. 

Noelle: Yeah. 

Natascha: I’d like to take a moment of silence in remembrance of him. What was his name? 

Noelle: David Dinkfeld. 

[Pause] 

Natascha: I wanted to know, how has your father influenced your art? 

Noelle: Yeah, that’s still something I’m trying to figure out. But I know that my dad was a very intense person, and he, you know, he had the sort of the mentality of that if your second place thats the first loser. And I was a swimmer before. He wanted me to win. Win, win. 

Natascha: Yeah. 

Noelle: Yeah. I think that when I pushed, you know, when I stepped back from that, because I had to. Because it was too much pressure. That was kind of a time when I retreated back into art. That was something that I could hold for myself. I would lock myself in my room and do art. I think. 

Noelle Cox, Mr.Sadie

Natascha: Did you ever have any professional training? 

Noelle: No, I mean. I went to; when I was seven, I went to watercolor classes that my dad took me to- my mom, my parents. I learned how to do a little bit of art. But no, I have- I tried to take a class in junior college but I’m so stubborn. I don’t want to be told how to paint, so. 

Natascha: Wow. The work that you’re putting out looks like it has gone through many courses. 

Noelle: Well, it takes a long time to do too. Yeah. 

Natascha: How long did it take you to look at a finished piece of yours and think, this is good quality work? I’m really feeling proud of the standard of work I’m putting out. 

Noelle: I think it’s more of a feeling that it gives me when I see it. But no work is really ever finished. I think mostly it’s about, for me: When I look at it, I’m just done with it. And it’s also combined with, that the image sort of disappears for me and then it doesn’t have anything else that I can add. Like disappears in the sense of not like not seeing it, but there’s nothing left. 

Natascha: I love the way you phrased that. What are your favorite things to paint? 

Noelle: Anything that means a lot to me. Yeah. The feeling it has to have some sort of meaning to me and something to say. Those are my favorite. 

Natascha: You mentioned that you use oil. Can you expand on the mediums you use and where you source your mediums? 

Noelle: I buy my oil paints from Blick and I get the Winsor and Newton. I mean, they’re not the greatest, but they’re affordable. 

Natascha: Okay. 

Noelle: I mean, it depends on which ones. There’s the higher end and then there’s the lower end, and I usually get the lower end. 

Natascha: And then you have to use a thinner with it, correct? 

Noelle: I just use the refined linseed oil. 

Natascha: Interesting. Thank you. What events in your life have influenced your work as a painter? 

Noelle: So many things. Being a mom, being a woman, you know, in this weird capitalistic, patriarchal culture that it seems like you can’t- it’s almost like we see ourselves as women through, like the patriarchal eye. And I think that it can be very confusing. Yeah, it’s bizarre. 

Noelle Cox, I love you Zed

Natascha: Your gallery work is different than your commissioned work. Next to you is a commission of my dog Zed, who passed a year ago. While your gallery work really encompasses these fantasized creatures and the animals and bugs. How has becoming a commissioned artist impacted the way you paint? 

Noelle Cox, The Fly on the Wall

Noelle: I think that what it does is it puts less- I think about myself less and I think about what other people want from me more. That’s the difference. My personal work is about my voice, about saying what I want to say. And then when you have the commission work, it’s- you’re trying to telepathically sort of connect with what another person wants out of your work, you know? 

Natascha: Yeah, there’s definitely a connection there. 

Natascha: What was the timeline and process like through the transition of painting for yourself and painting for others? When did you start opening yourself up to commission work? 

Noelle: So that was when the pop market died. It’s not just one time. It was a gradual thing, but it happened pretty quickly. 

Natascha: Yes. 

Noelle: And. You know, my husband and I we grew pot and that was how we made a living. And that was how I had the time and the money to be able to do art. I think that once we lost the farm I was like, what? What am I going to do? You know what everybody says is like, well, I shouldn’t say what everybody says, but what a lot of people say is, do what you love and make money at that. And so I tried. And I don’t regret it at all. But art is a tricky thing to make money on. It’s, you know, and especially in an economy, I think the economy globally is having a rough time right now. And on top of that our area here in Humboldt is having an even worse time because of that. There’s not as much money. 

Natascha: Agreed. 

Noelle: Yeah. 

Natascha: Has art played a healing role in your life? 

Noelle: Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. If I didn’t have it, I don’t know where I would be. It gives me stability and a voice. I would probably be an addict, honestly. 

Natascha: Go art. 

Noelle: Seriously, yeah. Because I’m so determined to do it and to keep doing it that I want to have the right state of mind for it. I don’t want to waste my life. I want to be able to do the best I can with what I have. 

Natascha: I think you’re speaking loudly to this community. And a lot of people could gain a lot of inspiration just from the words that you’re saying now. Thank you. 

I did have a chance to glance at your bio on the Morris grave site, and you mentioned that your move from SoCal to NorCal, was a culture shock that was both healing and dark. Would you say that your paintings now express your impression and self-expression of Humboldt? 

Noelle: Oh, yeah. But I don’t think it’s like- I think it’s more subliminal. The culture here in Humboldt is, in my opinion, way better than down in Southern California. Southern California is very, you know, it’s about money and looks, itemizing your body and it’s very Capitalistic, cultural, patriarchal. I don’t know, it’s very destructive. 

Natascha: Okay 

Noelle Cox

Noelle: And up here, there’s more of- at least in the social ring that I was in, there’s more of an awareness of the goddess and more of the feminine- the feminine power, rather than down in Southern California. It’s more like you’re an object for making money and stuff, and there’s not really any power besides how you are sexualized or whatever that is. This place is a very healthy place, compared to down there. 

Natascha: That really makes me wonder. Can you tell me a little bit more about your experience in Los Angeles and how perceptions of body image may have influenced your process as a painter, and what you paint? 

Noelle: Yeah, there’s a lot of pain in self-image when you grow up on movies and TV and plastic surgery and all this stuff. You start to learn what you’re valued as. I think that a lot of my self-portraits are a quest to accept myself as a human being, for being beautiful the way that I am and not an item. 

Natascha: Thank you. 

Noelle: Yeah. 

Natascha: What impact on your community do you want to convey with the message in your work? 

Noelle: I think that I want people to question why. Why things are the way they are. Don’t just go with what people say. Question it. You know, we need to reevaluate our perception and our way forward. 

Natascha: How does politics, governing, and even corruption play a part in your art? 

Noelle: Oh, politics is greatly corrupted no matter where you go. I’m sure that it has a lot of influence in subtle ways, but I try not to concentrate too much on it because I don’t really have a lot of faith in politics. And because I’ve understood that when you’re someone who wants to be in power, a politician. Those are the people that you don’t want to have in power. And I’m not really sure how to solve that in this system. 

Natascha: I think talking about is a great first step. 

Noelle: Yeah. 

Natascha: How does fun and play interact with your art and processing? 

Noelle: I used to have more fun. I think the trick is to not be married to your ideas so tightly and to try to let loose. When you get an image done, to not hold so tightly to it. If it’s not working, let it have room, and that’s the play. But it does take discipline too. And then sometimes I have good days where I’m painting and I’m just like, yeah, this is great, you know, and I do like a little jig or whatever. 

Natascha: And then others, you don’t. 

Noelle: Yes. 

Natascha: Every time you see people painting on social media, they look so happy. And sometimes when I paint, it’s like, fuck, shit. 

Noelle: Oh, yeah. 

Noelle Cox

Noelle: Well, I mean, that’s like at least half of it. You know, it’s a lot of frustration and it’s a lot of work. And I think that one of the things that a lot of people who don’t paint don’t realize is- that I think a lot of people think that painting is just like this happy go lucky. You know, you just poop out of product without any like, you know, effort. But it takes a lot of effort and a lot of commitment and a lot of times, a lot of times it is very consuming and frustrating. And it’s a lifestyle, really.

Natascha: Wow. 

Noelle: Yeah. 

Natascha: How long does it take you to paint a painting? 

Noelle: Well, I think it depends, but for this one, it takes. I think it took about 25 days of full, full 25 days. Not including building the frame and working the image, like going, okay. I’m going to work with this image and then you dream on it and you think about it and you kind of formulate it. And that takes time too. It’s more just like a subconscious time. But yeah, it consumes you, you know? It’s the way that I live. 

Natascha: You’re very generous with the way you value your art, the way that you offer to others. Thank you. Thank you for putting all your time and effort into it. 

Noelle: Yeah. You’re welcome, very much. 

Natascha: How do you know when the painting is done? 

Noelle: When I’m just done, [laughter] I mean, I don’t know. Yeah. That’s a hard question. I mean, when it sometimes a painting will start to become invisible to me, as in, not like I can see it, but it’s not- I’m not feeling it anymore. And I think that’s kind of when it becomes done is there’s nothing else I can add. 

Natascha: What motivates your color palette? 

Noelle: I love warm colors. Um, you know, but blues are not my favorite. Um, but I love the sky. You know, the sky blues are- When you’re painting a sky, you got to use blue but I, you know, my favorite colors are red, black and gold. 

Natascha: Cool. Who are some of your favorite artists? 

Noelle: You know, I don’t really look at a lot of art, honestly. I think that a lot of people are artists that don’t create art. I’ve gone through my different, like, I like Klimt. But lately, the artists that I’ve been really inspired by are people who have been doing research and, you know, creating ideas of a reality that we don’t see in what we’re taught in our culture. You know, like Marija Gimbutas and Vicki Noble and people who are visioning a different reality, a different future for us. That’s important. It’s very important. 

Natascha: What work of art that you’ve made are you the proudest of? And can you tell me in depth details about your processing? 

Noelle: I think- I’m not sure about proud, but I guess, I don’t know, probably Beneath The Veil. The cross one. That was the most- it took a while, and it was the most involved. It took a lot of [pause] looking inside about how I’m feeling about all this and what it means. How I’m feeling about the signals I’m getting from- throughout my life. With that one, because I used to have, like, sort of a vague image that would come to me and then I would create a frame around it. But with that one- I had to make that cross frame. And it had sit in storage for a good year or two until I finally formulated what needed to be on it. And that’s usually what I do now, is that I create different shapes. 

Noelle Cox

[Recording got interrupted.] 

Noelle: Yeah, the actual frame. Because I like to create frames that are different sizes or different shapes and stuff because I get tired of painting in squares and rectangles. The different shapes actually conjure different feelings for me. And so that’s an avenue that I can work with. 

Noelle: That one was in storage for a while and it took a little bit. Well, a little bit, it took probably about a year to actually really be… Honest with how I’m feeling. I mean, I’m really good at being honest about things, but you have to let things, solidify and coagulate and then you start working with the image and drawing it on a piece of paper and kind of working through the different symbolism and what it means to me and how people might interpret it. So, there’s a lot of cerebral stuff. You have to kind of be in touch with your subconscious. I’ve been learning more about the things that I didn’t learn in public school or just the culture in general, is that there’s quite a bit of subconscious stuff going on for everybody. And I try to, you know, use my intuition and to go into that route of subconscious. 

Natascha: Would you say it’s a joint subconscious? Is this something that you feel on a communal level? 

Noelle: I think. 

Noelle: The older I get, the more I realize that it’s possible that I have sort of empathic, or I don’t really know what that is, but there’s signals and it’s hard to- it’s hard to know. What it is. But I think that there’s communication and there’s like, I just have to say what I’m feeling, I’m still trying to figure this out [head scratch.] 

Natascha: Sometimes I like to think that it bubbles out. It comes up to the surface and- 

Noelle: Just. 

Natascha: Comes out. 

Noelle: And that’s the way that I can- or that I feel like I can. That’s my voice. I feel most confident being able to communicate through painting,  through imagery. 

Natascha: Lovely. 

Noelle Cox

Natascha: If you had a message you wanted to share with emerging artists, what would it be? 

Noelle: I think it depends on what kind of artist you are. 

Natascha: Okay.  

Noelle: People want, you know, neutral, beautiful images, and they’ll buy them. But there’s not a lot of money right now. I think that part of an artist’s job, if you want to make money at it, because I don’t, you know, I make a little bit here and there but it’s connections. You have to be social. You have to socialize in a group that has a lot of money. But at the same time, a lot of people who have a lot of money. And I’m not saying everybody, but a lot of people who have a lot of money, they’re not going to- You’re kind of a toy. You’re something to play with. And I mean, not saying that with everybody, but they launder money through it and, you know, it’s a whole game. But yeah, it’s not. Anyways my advice is to be careful and to listen to yourself, your inner self and what it is that you want out of it. Because this world is full of givers and takers, and there’s a lot of takers. And you have to be careful and to not don’t dishonor yourself. Yeah. 

Natascha: What upcoming pieces or exhibits can we look forward to see from you in the future? 

Noelle: I don’t have any personal work shows coming up, but I do have the mounted prints that I make. They’re going to be shown at the Humboldt Herbs Herbals this November and December and then in Arcata, at the A to Z, I care. Yeah. 

Natascha: The same pieces? 

Noelle: I’m making a whole stack of mounted prints. 

Natascha: Well, thank you so much for your time today. I’m happy to take home our commission piece. I love you, Zed. My family’s 12-year-old terrier passed away in the summer of 2024. Below is Noelle Cox’s oil on canvas painting and Zed’s obituary. Thank you so much. 

Noelle: Thank you so much. So much. 

Noelle Cox

Zed’s Obituary

I met Zed in February 2016, the first night I stayed with Jeremy in the Tarzan house in Oceanside. We watched Courage the Cowardly Dog, and Zed had his precious tennis ball. Jeremy drew his pointer finger along the horizon, and Zed nudged the ball with his nose, following Jeremy’s line. I remember Jeremy having a profound connection with his dog, and I thought if this guy is that good to his dog, he will be that good to his woman. Zed always loved to lick face and bark at squirrels. On long car rides, he would get excited over the cows. No matter where we went, Zed was always a good guard dog, friendly to cats, a cuddler, and licker. When it was just Jeremy, Zed, and me living in the tent, Zed would sleep curled against my belly, and I imagined him as my baby.

When I moved in with Tallulah in her LB apartment, Jeremy followed shortly after, and Tallulah was nervous to host Zed with her two cats. But Zed was really good with the cats, and she grew to love Zed. On our wedding day Zed walked with Orion and I down the aisle. Everyone thought it was rehearsed, but Zed just knew, knew that the day was something special, and when we got down to the stand, he stood post at Jeremy’s side. I cannot imagine the sense of loss Jeremy has; their bond was unbreakable. Every day with Zed was absolutely beautiful, full of love and care. He was an emotional support dog for me and kept me calm and supported while I went through hard times. He was an emotional support dog to Halaya as she transitioned into a new home with a new mother figure, and he was by Malakai’s side from the moment of birth. Zed went on lots of walks, he ate lots of good meat, and slept in our bed every night. I got to spend his last night with him against my belly; after we’ve gotten so far together, into a home, a family, our babies. Jeremy got to spend Zed’s last moments with him, watching the sunrise. I wish I could spend a million more nights with Zed, a million more walks, a million more face licks, but he’s in a better place, and I am grateful for the memories we had. I love you, Zed.