On November twentieth, around nine in the morning, Natascha and her family friend, Sam P, met with Satya at Ramone’s Bakery and Coffee in Eureka. Their conversation became a deep dive into Satya’s history in the healing arts and the many ways she serves the community as a facilitator of sound baths, microdose offerings, yoga, reiki, and tuning fork sessions. Satya has brought peace of mind to many by offering a safe space to release, recover, nurture, and learn how to move through life’s challenges with greater ease.
As we enter the winter season, we invite you to explore the power of sound healing and discover how giving this practice a chance can enhance your life in the most positive way.
Natascha: Good morning Satya. Thank you so much for joining me today. At Little Lost Forest we’re always honored to highlight local healers, artists and visionaries. And today we’re in for a special treat. Humboldt County sound healing artist Satya Earth, founder of Satya Healing, is here to share her journey, her craft and the heart centered intention behind her work. I first discovered Satya during one of her sound healings and mushroom microdose sits. Over the course of about 90 minutes, a small mushroom microdose, gentle yoga and closed eyes opened the door to a vivid inner landscape. The soundscape she and her collaborators created carried me from the depths of the ocean to a fairy lantern forest, and eventually into the far reaches of space. The magic she facilitates comes not only from the instruments she uses, but from a deep well of knowledge, intuition, and care. Today we dive into that magic, its origins, its purpose, and the person behind it. Can you tell us a little bit about yourself?
Satya:Thank you for having me here. It’s really great to see you. A little bit about myself. I’m a mama of two little ones. They are my whole world and have been a driving force for my evolution in the landscape of sound healing, energy work and working with medicine. My background comes from psychology. I majored in psychology and got my bachelor’s in 2014, and from there I decided to branch out and study different forms of holistic healing. I studied yoga and herbalism, energy work, and sound healing, and have now branched out into the realm of working with psilocybin.
Natascha: Yay! Thank you for sharing. When did your journey with sound healing begin?
Satya: I attended my first sound bath with Jen Madrone back in 2017, and that was an initiation into the world of sound healing and experiencing. Noticing where I was in my life at that time.
Sound healing can stir up a lot of things for us, especially if we’re just beginning the journey. Throughout the years, I’ve gathered tools to support integrating the experiences and emotions that arise when receiving sound healing. This has helped to make it easier to understand and navigate the things that come up. It can really bring up a lot of stuff. Like old stories and thought patterns. Bringing them forward to be acknowledged and felt. It was a beautiful introduction to getting to know myself. The stories that I hold and how to how to work with them and how to transform them. In 2021 was when I bought my first gong and that was inspired through the birth of my second daughter. I had a very challenging experience with postpartum depression. In a place of desperation to not return to pharmaceuticals, I searched online things that could help my nervous system and help with depression and anxiety. Sound healing was the first thing that popped up. I was reminded of my experiences with Jen and decided to take the leap to purchase my first gong.
Natascha: That’s beautiful. I really love how you worked against the postpartum and found natural ways to heal instead of falling into it. Did you have any mentors or influential teachers along the way?
Satya: Absolutely. My number one mentor, her name is Josie Bravo. I met her when I was when I was in a hospital. I had a really hard adolescence; childhood. She met me at some of the hardest times in my life. I’ve known her for 29 years now. She has been a guiding light and I wouldn’t be where I am today without her support.
Natascha: Wow.
Satya: She’s been a really big influence. Like a guardian angel for me along this path. My other mentors are Jen Madrone. She’s an incredible being, here in Humboldt County. I’ve studied Reiki II and my Master Reiki course with her. A couple other influential teachers are Eileen McKusick. She’s the woman that discovered tuning the human biofield. I love blending my own interpretation of her teachings into my sessions. I scan the field with a tuning fork and listen for different sounds and that resonate from the tuning forks to let me know where there is perhaps some stuck energy that can be brought into coherent energy. Another incredible teacher that I haven’t had the opportunity to learn from yet, but I’ve heard great things of his name is Mike Tamburo and he will be here in Humboldt County in March 2026.
Natascha: What will Mike be teaching you or working with you?
Satya: He’s a gong master. He’ll be doing three day long class for a few days. And we’ll be learning different techniques and styles of how to work with sacred healing instruments, mainly gongs.
Natascha: During your sessions, there’s usually other people in the room that are playing the instruments along with you or offering the mushroom micro-doses. Who do you choose to collaborate with for your sound healing sessions?
Satya: I just collaborated with Fallon Orr. We had a beautiful offering where we offered microdosing, yoga nidra and sound healing. It was a different space from the class that that you attended. More stillness and opportunity to reflect in that stillness. It was very supportive for rest.
I just received my certification as a psychedelic facilitator through Emerald Valley Institute. After sharing medicine in the community for nearly 4 years, I decided I wanted to learn more about the history, culture and varying approaches to holding ceremony in psychedelic spaces. Another person I have worked with is Michiah Tobin. She’s an acupuncturist based out of Fortuna. I love blending multiple modalities together for a transformative intentional experience.
Natascha: Well thank you. How do these sounds and frequencies impact your participants?
Satya: That’s a great question. Each person and how they experience sound is very unique. And each session is very unique. Some of the things that I have noticed participants experience would be emotional clearing and release. I’ve heard some really good feedback on how people will come into a session feeling highly stressed and overwhelmed with life and would leave with a new state of grounded clarity. The beautiful thing about sound healing is that it creates neural plasticity and neurogenesis. By approaching your session with an intention this offers us an opportunity to see, feel and think differently about the things that we’re experiencing in life. And like you said, when we’re in this space there are visuals, there’s feelings of floating. It can be a psychedelic experience without the medicine, with the things that we see and that we feel. It offers a place of deep rest for the nervous system.
Natascha: Absolutely. I definitely found a release for my anxiety when I go to your sound healings and I feel really well going back into the world, more prepared. Your vocal work is especially moving where you learn to sing? What language or tradition are you drawing from?
Satya: I’ve been singing since I was three. Song has been a part of my whole life. I was in choir for eight years, and I was in a band for a couple years. Interestingly, I always felt nervous. And to this day, I still feel some nerves before I sing. But, after I traveled to India back in 2014, I was studying yoga there and we learned a lot of mantras and Sanskrit prayers. It is in this place of prayer that the anxiety dissolves and my intention of sharing song expands. I sing in Sanskrit, and the songs that you’ve probably heard are called the beginning prayer, the ending prayer and the Anahata prayer.
Our voices are our most powerful instrument, and it’s my mission to continue sharing this instrument, along with these other instruments and empowering other people to come into a place of comfort in their own body and their voice. I encourage people when I’m singing, when the sounds are going; we can hum, we can sing too, and start to vocalize because that’s how we can move energy throughout our body.
Natascha: Yeah, that’s some of my favorite moments. I really enjoy your singing, and I like that you pushed me to sing and your participants to sing, because oftentimes I don’t use my voice. It does resonate with me, and it does bring something positive out. So thank you for doing that. What dreams and aspirations do you have for such a healing moving forward?
Satya: I love this question.
Natascha: What’s next?
Satya: Yes I am so excited about what’s next.
I am creating some packages to make these experiences more accessible. After going through my psychedelic facilitator training, I really want to work with marginalized communities. Whether that means I look into what it would be to become a nonprofit or I look into fiscal sponsorship. I really believe that this type of medicine is something that everybody needs.
Natascha: Cool. I can’t wait to see where you go with it. Was there anyone who inspired the evolution of your art or an event? Possibly.
Satya: Absolutely. I had some moments to reflect on this, and the evolution of my art truthfully, has come from a place of pain and suffering and knowing that these wounds can be transformed. And I’m speaking from a mother wound that without that experience and without those wounds, I wouldn’t be where I’m at today. Having a troubled relationship inspired me to ask: how can I best show up for myself and how can I best show up for my children and for my community? How can I create this space of safety and trust within myself and within my community?
I’ve been learning different communication styles, like compassionate communication, paraphrasing and reflecting. These are all practices that I’m in a space of learning right now and eager to implement into how I parent my children and how I speak to myself, how I speak to my community and to my clients, and I’m really encouraging all of us to become more curious about how are we communicating with ourselves? How are we communicating with our loved ones? Because this is where we can we can really come together and come together in a space of safety and trust.
Natascha: I think you’re really advocating for people that are struggling, that there’s a light on the end of the tunnel. As a mother, too, there’s a lot of stress in motherhood and seeing you blossom and bloom that shows that we don’t have to be the pain of our families, but that we could create our own positive walk of life and the way that you impact your community. It loudly speaks that you walk the walk that you’re not just talk. So thank you for doing all the all the work you do with us here in Humboldt. What are your thoughts on human consciousness?
Satya: Another fabulous question, Natascha. My thoughts on human consciousness; human consciousness to me, is a state of being. I come from a spiritual and perhaps Buddhist approach where I believe that all living sentient beings from our animals to the trees to the rocks, to the dirt, to the insects. We all have a consciousness. We are all here coexisting as one on this cell of Earth. And when we can come into that place of connection, we can really start to come together in this collective ecosystem.
Natascha: That’s beautiful. How does that deconstruct the ego when you come into a mindset of a universal consciousness?
Satya: Mmm, yeah. We’re definitely deconstructing the ego and perhaps deconstructing the hierarchy of humans being at the top and everything else being below us. I know that there is definitely some advancement in technology where we are now having the opportunity to communicate with our animal friends. And it is deconstructing how we view our existence and how we view the existence of other beings in this world. It’s really powerful. We can come into this from a wholehearted space, or we can, you know, use it for power. So it’s really up to the individual and how we approach this type of technology. Language is technology too. You know, it’s like these things are always advancing. And so it’s like, who is behind this and what are our intentions behind it? And it’s how we show up and how we reflect that into our circles and into our community. And that’s when we really have that opportunity again, to come together into this collective space of awareness, which is kind of linking to that state of consciousness, the consciousness and the awareness, how we show up, how we reflect, how we have awareness of our energy and how we impact the environment around us. I feel like I could go on forever.
Natascha: I love this, I just want to dig a little deeper into it. You mentioned animals briefly. Is there a connection between your sound healing and nature? Maybe you play your music outside, or you feel a deeper connection to the earth and to the animals when you perform sound healing?
Satya: Absolutely. I have a very deep connection with the elements and with nature. When I take my gong out and I play next to that maple tree and Cheatham Grove, I’m playing for that tree and I’m playing for the land. And I just imagine this time lapse of this tree living there and all the things that have surrounded it. And for me, I just, I want to be with that tree for that moment and play the sounds. And when I play my infinity disc, that sounds like the ocean, I’m like, man, this tree won’t ever have that opportunity to be by the ocean. So maybe I could bring the ocean to the tree.
Natascha: Cool and lastly, what are your beliefs or reflections on the afterlife?
Satya: Reflections on the afterlife. I do believe that we are reincarnated. I do believe in karma. I believe that the things that we’re experiencing in this life are perhaps a reflection of the life we’ve led before. I also go between this, you know, when we die, we go into the void. We go into emptiness. No one knows. And we have access to so much information that we can decide what we want to believe. But we truly just don’t ever know. So when I think about what the afterlife is, I like to consider a lot of things. But I also don’t have a concrete belief because nobody truly knows.
Natascha: Absolutely.Do you have any advice for someone that might be depressed, anxious, or struggling in their life? How to get out of that negative spiral?
Satya: Well, there are many approaches to helping ourselves through these stagnant, dark places. The first approach that I like to suggest is, depending on the severity of it, is having a counselor or a therapist. Somebody to offer an objective perspective, somebody who will support us in our stories that we share and perhaps guide us into healthier states of thinking. Also bringing in the element of what are we putting in and on our body. And that’s not just food, that’s not just cosmetics. That includes the things that we watch, that includes the people that we surround ourselves with. That includes supplements that we’re taking. So it’s really a whole approach when we start getting into this world of depression and anxiety. I mean, we can look at our gut microbiome that’s definitely linked to anxiety. Parasites are linked to anxiety. And then when we start to go in a little bit deeper outside of the the physical being of depression and anxiety, we can start to go into like the emotional body and the ethereal body, and that’s where we can bring in these alternative modalities to help us. That could be energy work, that could be sound healing and microdosing. But then again, drawing it back into the self, it’s really about our perspective, how we speak to ourself. So again, coming into that tug of war that we experience when we’re going into this place of depression and anxiety: The stories that we tell ourselves, how we talk to ourselves. And a lot of this is linked to how we were raised and how we were talked to and how we were taught to manage these things.
Satya: In my psychedelic facilitator training, we learned about this thing called the default mode network. And when we’re born, up until we’re about four, this network in our mind is very malleable. But around the age four, we are now learning to exist in the world through the way that we are talked to by our family members and the authority around us. And those pathways start to get very rigid. And so then we start existing in that story. So when we are working with psilocybin in larger doses, we have the opportunity to do what is called a reset dose, where the default mode network gets shut down. And this is where we have access to new pathways, new ways of thinking and feeling existing, perceiving and we want to be slow with this. Whenever we’re in this place of depression and anxiety, how long did it take us to get here? How long have we been in that place? And just know that there’s no one pill. There’s no one experience that’s going to shift things. This is a practice that we have to implement and be dedicated to daily. The most important facet of that is who are we surrounding ourselves with? Who is our support system, our community, the classes we attend, the people we talk to. These are all factors to consider when we’re starting to address these symptoms of depression and anxiety.
Natascha: Coming into the winter, is there are certain practices that you do seasonally; more winter style forms of healing?
Satya: When we come into the winter. I personally think about darkness. I think about going into a place of hibernation. I think about what is nature doing? And I do my best as a single mother, to slow down. Some practices that we can do is look at how we can slow down. How we can create spaciousness and just noticing when we are overdoing. When we are doing too much and just taking a moment to step back, reflect and say “hey, I need to cancel.”
Satya: One practice that I learned recently that’s been so helpful, is tuning into our breath and tuning into what it means to clear our energetic field. When we are starting to experience that tightness in the body, or we notice we’re getting really overwhelmed and feeling frantic. Come back into the breath. Breathe through the souls at the feet.
Satya: And as we’re exhaling, we’re releasing this energy out through the crown of the head. And this is the cycle. Breathing in through the feet, coming through the center of the body, breathing out through the crown. And as we continue this breath, we’re starting to think about, I’m breathing in calm and I am letting go of any tension. I’m letting go of any chaos that I’m holding in my belly, that I’m holding in my heart. I’m holding in my brain. I’m letting that go. I’m returning it to sender. I’m returning it to the universe. And I love this practice, especially for people who are highly sensitive or for highly empathic people. People who tend to absorb energies easily. This is an amazing breath practice, because then we get to tune into not only our breath and clearing our fields, but we’re starting to acknowledge what is mine and what is not mine. What am I holding on to? Maybe I’m holding on to something that I experienced yesterday, and now it’s time to let that go. And it’s time to bring in that clearing and that self-forgiveness, so that we can have a clear field and show up for our friends and our family in a more balanced state.
Natascha: As we move into the winter, sound healing offers a powerful way to calm the nervous system, reconnect with the heart, and bring clarity to the mind. Satya, thank you so much for your time and for sharing your wisdom with our Little Lost Forest community.
Satya: Thank you so much. I appreciate you. Thank you for calling me in and sharing these moments together. Blessings.
Natascha: This is Natascha with the Little Lost Forest blog. Today I will be interviewing Noelle Cox, a local Eureka legend who specializes in oil paints, gold leaf, and customized frames. Noel Cox showcased her exhibit Underneath the Surface at Morris Graves in January 2024. Noel takes a surreal and abstract approach to local animals. Fantasized creatures, glorified bugs, and self-portraits. In her sci-fi paintings, a dark humor lingers in the foreground as each piece is staged with class and elegance. It’s September 7th, around 5:00, and we’re sitting down together in her home studio.
Natascha: Hi, Noel. How are you doing today?
Noelle: I’m okay. I’m good. It’s good to have you.
Natascha: Thanks for having me.
Noelle: Thank you for having an interview with me.
Natascha: I was very excited all the way up to this point. So thank you so much for sitting with me.
How old were you when you started seeing yourself as an artist?
Noelle: Well, I think it was kind of gradual, but I think that I really got serious when I was about 16. I painted my first oil painting. Yeah, but I would draw, you know, I took it very seriously, actually. It was something I could do by myself that I could feel sacred about.
Natascha: And what was the oil painting of?
Noelle: It was kind of dark. It was a dead lady. With strings attached to it in the night sky.
Natascha: And how did it make you feel when you saw the finished piece?
Noelle: I wasn’t quite, you know, what do you call it? Satisfied with it. But when I look at it/ when I looked at it, I was like, wow, okay, This is kind of how I feel, you know?
Natascha: From what I understood, your father just passed.
Noelle: Yeah.
Natascha: I’d like to take a moment of silence in remembrance of him. What was his name?
Noelle: David Dinkfeld.
[Pause]
Natascha: I wanted to know, how has your father influenced your art?
Noelle: Yeah, that’s still something I’m trying to figure out. But I know that my dad was a very intense person, and he, you know, he had the sort of the mentality of that if your second place thats the first loser. And I was a swimmer before. He wanted me to win. Win, win.
Natascha: Yeah.
Noelle: Yeah. I think that when I pushed, you know, when I stepped back from that, because I had to. Because it was too much pressure. That was kind of a time when I retreated back into art. That was something that I could hold for myself. I would lock myself in my room and do art. I think.
Noelle Cox, Mr.Sadie
Natascha: Did you ever have any professional training?
Noelle: No, I mean. I went to; when I was seven, I went to watercolor classes that my dad took me to- my mom, my parents. I learned how to do a little bit of art. But no, I have- I tried to take a class in junior college but I’m so stubborn. I don’t want to be told how to paint, so.
Natascha: Wow. The work that you’re putting out looks like it has gone through many courses.
Noelle: Well, it takes a long time to do too. Yeah.
Natascha: How long did it take you to look at a finished piece of yours and think, this is good quality work? I’m really feeling proud of the standard of work I’m putting out.
Noelle: I think it’s more of a feeling that it gives me when I see it. But no work is really ever finished. I think mostly it’s about, for me: When I look at it, I’m just done with it. And it’s also combined with, that the image sort of disappears for me and then it doesn’t have anything else that I can add. Like disappears in the sense of not like not seeing it, but there’s nothing left.
Natascha: I love the way you phrased that. What are your favorite things to paint?
Noelle: Anything that means a lot to me. Yeah. The feeling it has to have some sort of meaning to me and something to say. Those are my favorite.
Natascha: You mentioned that you use oil. Can you expand on the mediums you use and where you source your mediums?
Noelle: I buy my oil paints from Blick and I get the Winsor and Newton. I mean, they’re not the greatest, but they’re affordable.
Natascha: Okay.
Noelle: I mean, it depends on which ones. There’s the higher end and then there’s the lower end, and I usually get the lower end.
Natascha: And then you have to use a thinner with it, correct?
Noelle: I just use the refined linseed oil.
Natascha: Interesting. Thank you. What events in your life have influenced your work as a painter?
Noelle: So many things. Being a mom, being a woman, you know, in this weird capitalistic, patriarchal culture that it seems like you can’t- it’s almost like we see ourselves as women through, like the patriarchal eye. And I think that it can be very confusing.Yeah, it’s bizarre.
Noelle Cox, I love you Zed
Natascha: Your gallery work is different than your commissioned work. Next to you is a commission of my dog Zed, who passed a year ago. While your gallery work really encompasses these fantasized creatures and the animals and bugs. How has becoming a commissioned artist impacted the way you paint?
Noelle Cox, The Fly on the Wall
Noelle: I think that what it does is it puts less- I think about myself less and I think about what other people want from me more. That’s the difference. My personal work is about my voice, about saying what I want to say. And then when you have the commission work, it’s- you’re trying to telepathically sort of connect with what another person wants out of your work, you know?
Natascha: Yeah, there’s definitely a connection there.
Natascha: What was the timeline and process like through the transition of painting for yourself and painting for others? When did you start opening yourself up to commission work?
Noelle: So that was when the pop market died. It’s not just one time. It was a gradual thing, but it happened pretty quickly.
Natascha: Yes.
Noelle: And. You know, my husband and I we grew pot and that was how we made a living. And that was how I had the time and the money to be able to do art. I think that once we lost the farm I was like, what? What am I going to do? You know what everybody says is like, well, I shouldn’t say what everybody says, but what a lot of people say is, do what you love and make money at that. And so I tried. And I don’t regret it at all. But art is a tricky thing to make money on. It’s, you know, and especially in an economy, I think the economy globally is having a rough time right now. And on top of that our area here in Humboldt is having an even worse time because of that. There’s not as much money.
Natascha: Agreed.
Noelle: Yeah.
Natascha: Has art played a healing role in your life?
Noelle: Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. If I didn’t have it, I don’t know where I would be. It gives me stability and a voice. I would probably be an addict, honestly.
Natascha: Go art.
Noelle: Seriously, yeah. Because I’m so determined to do it and to keep doing it that I want to have the right state of mind for it. I don’t want to waste my life. I want to be able to do the best I can with what I have.
Natascha: I think you’re speaking loudly to this community. And a lot of people could gain a lot of inspiration just from the words that you’re saying now. Thank you.
I did have a chance to glance at your bio on the Morris grave site, and you mentioned that your move from SoCal to NorCal, was a culture shock that was both healing and dark. Would you say that your paintings now express your impression and self-expression of Humboldt?
Noelle: Oh, yeah. But I don’t think it’s like- I think it’s more subliminal. The culture here in Humboldt is, in my opinion, way better than down in Southern California. Southern California is very, you know, it’s about money and looks, itemizing your body and it’s very Capitalistic, cultural, patriarchal. I don’t know, it’s very destructive.
Natascha: Okay
Noelle Cox
Noelle: And up here, there’s more of- at least in the social ring that I was in, there’s more of an awareness of the goddess and more of the feminine- the feminine power, rather than down in Southern California. It’s more like you’re an object for making money and stuff, and there’s not really any power besides how you are sexualized or whatever that is. This place is a very healthy place, compared to down there.
Natascha: That really makes me wonder. Can you tell me a little bit more about your experience in Los Angeles and how perceptions of body image may have influenced your process as a painter, and what you paint?
Noelle: Yeah, there’s a lot of pain in self-image when you grow up on movies and TV and plastic surgery and all this stuff. You start to learn what you’re valued as. I think that a lot of my self-portraits are a quest to accept myself as a human being, for being beautiful the way that I am and not an item.
Natascha: Thank you.
Noelle: Yeah.
Natascha: What impact on your community do you want to convey with the message in your work?
Noelle: I think that I want people to question why. Why things are the way they are. Don’t just go with what people say. Question it. You know, we need to reevaluate our perception and our way forward.
Natascha: How does politics, governing, and even corruption play a part in your art?
Noelle: Oh, politics is greatly corrupted no matter where you go. I’m sure that it has a lot of influence in subtle ways, but I try not to concentrate too much on it because I don’t really have a lot of faith in politics. And because I’ve understood that when you’re someone who wants to be in power, a politician. Those are the people that you don’t want to have in power. And I’m not really sure how to solve that in this system.
Natascha: I think talking about is a great first step.
Noelle: Yeah.
Natascha: How does fun and play interact with your art and processing?
Noelle: I used to have more fun. I think the trick is to not be married to your ideas so tightly and to try to let loose. When you get an image done, to not hold so tightly to it. If it’s not working, let it have room, and that’s the play. But it does take discipline too. And then sometimes I have good days where I’m painting and I’m just like, yeah, this is great, you know, and I do like a little jig or whatever.
Natascha: And then others, you don’t.
Noelle: Yes.
Natascha: Every time you see people painting on social media, they look so happy. And sometimes when I paint, it’s like, fuck, shit.
Noelle: Oh, yeah.
Noelle Cox
Noelle: Well, I mean, that’s like at least half of it. You know, it’s a lot of frustration and it’s a lot of work. And I think that one of the things that a lot of people who don’t paint don’t realize is- that I think a lot of people think that painting is just like this happy go lucky. You know, you just poop out of product without any like, you know, effort. But it takes a lot of effort and a lot of commitment and a lot of times, a lot of times it is very consuming and frustrating. And it’s a lifestyle, really.
Natascha: Wow.
Noelle: Yeah.
Natascha: How long does it take you to paint a painting?
Noelle: Well, I think it depends, but for this one, it takes. I think it took about 25 days of full, full 25 days. Not including building the frame and working the image, like going, okay. I’m going to work with this image and then you dream on it and you think about it and you kind of formulate it. And that takes time too. It’s more just like a subconscious time. But yeah, it consumes you, you know? It’s the way that I live.
Natascha: You’re very generous with the way you value your art, the way that you offer to others. Thank you. Thank you for putting all your time and effort into it.
Noelle: Yeah. You’re welcome, very much.
Natascha: How do you know when the painting is done?
Noelle: When I’m just done, [laughter] I mean, I don’t know. Yeah. That’s a hard question. I mean, when it sometimes a painting will start to become invisible to me, as in, not like I can see it, but it’s not- I’m not feeling it anymore. And I think that’s kind of when it becomes done is there’s nothing else I can add.
Natascha: What motivates your color palette?
Noelle: I love warm colors. Um, you know, but blues are not my favorite. Um, but I love the sky. You know, the sky blues are- When you’re painting a sky, you got to use blue but I, you know, my favorite colors are red, black and gold.
Natascha: Cool. Who are some of your favorite artists?
Noelle: You know, I don’t really look at a lot of art, honestly. I think that a lot of people are artists that don’t create art. I’ve gone through my different, like, I like Klimt. But lately, the artists that I’ve been really inspired by are people who have been doing research and, you know, creating ideas of a reality that we don’t see in what we’re taught in our culture. You know, like Marija Gimbutas and Vicki Noble and people who are visioning a different reality, a different future for us. That’s important. It’s very important.
Natascha: What work of art that you’ve made are you the proudest of? And can you tell me in depth details about your processing?
Noelle: I think- I’m not sure about proud, but I guess, I don’t know, probably Beneath The Veil. The cross one. That was the most- it took a while, and it was the most involved. It took a lot of [pause] looking inside about how I’m feeling about all this and what it means. How I’m feeling about the signals I’m getting from- throughout my life. With that one, because I used to have, like, sort of a vague image that would come to me and then I would create a frame around it. But with that one- I had to make that cross frame. And it had sit in storage for a good year or two until I finally formulated what needed to be on it. And that’s usually what I do now, is that I create different shapes.
Noelle Cox
[Recording got interrupted.]
Noelle: Yeah, the actual frame. Because I like to create frames that are different sizes or different shapes and stuff because I get tired of painting in squares and rectangles. The different shapes actually conjure different feelings for me. And so that’s an avenue that I can work with.
Noelle: That one was in storage for a while and it took a little bit. Well, a little bit, it took probably about a year to actually really be… Honest with how I’m feeling. I mean, I’m really good at being honest about things, but you have to let things, solidify and coagulate and then you start working with the image and drawing it on a piece of paper and kind of working through the different symbolism and what it means to me and how people might interpret it. So, there’s a lot of cerebral stuff. You have to kind of be in touch with your subconscious. I’ve been learning more about the things that I didn’t learn in public school or just the culture in general, is that there’s quite a bit of subconscious stuff going on for everybody. And I try to, you know, use my intuition and to go into that route of subconscious.
Natascha: Would you say it’s a joint subconscious? Is this something that you feel on a communal level?
Noelle: I think.
Noelle: The older I get, the more I realize that it’s possible that I have sort of empathic, or I don’t really know what that is, but there’s signals and it’s hard to- it’s hard to know. What it is. But I think that there’s communication and there’s like, I just have to say what I’m feeling, I’m still trying to figure this out [head scratch.]
Natascha: Sometimes I like to think that it bubbles out. It comes up to the surface and-
Noelle: Just.
Natascha: Comes out.
Noelle: And that’s the way that I can- or that I feel like I can. That’s my voice. I feel most confident being able to communicate through painting, through imagery.
Natascha: Lovely.
Noelle Cox
Natascha: If you had a message you wanted to share with emerging artists, what would it be?
Noelle: I think it depends on what kind of artist you are.
Natascha: Okay.
Noelle: People want, you know, neutral, beautiful images, and they’ll buy them. But there’s not a lot of money right now. I think that part of an artist’s job, if you want to make money at it, because I don’t, you know, I make a little bit here and there but it’s connections. You have to be social. You have to socialize in a group that has a lot of money. But at the same time, a lot of people who have a lot of money. And I’m not saying everybody, but a lot of people who have a lot of money, they’re not going to- You’re kind of a toy. You’re something to play with. And I mean, not saying that with everybody, but they launder money through it and, you know, it’s a whole game. But yeah, it’s not. Anyways my advice is to be careful and to listen to yourself, your inner self and what it is that you want out of it. Because this world is full of givers and takers, and there’s a lot of takers. And you have to be careful and to not don’t dishonor yourself. Yeah.
Natascha: What upcoming pieces or exhibits can we look forward to see from you in the future?
Noelle: I don’t have any personal work shows coming up, but I do have the mounted prints that I make. They’re going to be shown at the Humboldt Herbs Herbals this November and December and then in Arcata, at the A to Z, I care. Yeah.
Natascha: The same pieces?
Noelle: I’m making a whole stack of mounted prints.
Natascha: Well, thank you so much for your time today. I’m happy to take home our commission piece. I love you, Zed. My family’s 12-year-old terrier passed away in the summer of 2024. Below is Noelle Cox’s oil on canvas painting and Zed’s obituary. Thank you so much.
Noelle: Thank you so much. So much.
Noelle Cox
Zed’s Obituary
I met Zed in February 2016, the first night I stayed with Jeremy in the Tarzan house in Oceanside. We watched Courage the Cowardly Dog, and Zed had his precious tennis ball. Jeremy drew his pointer finger along the horizon, and Zed nudged the ball with his nose, following Jeremy’s line. I remember Jeremy having a profound connection with his dog, and I thought if this guy is that good to his dog, he will be that good to his woman. Zed always loved to lick face and bark at squirrels. On long car rides, he would get excited over the cows. No matter where we went, Zed was always a good guard dog, friendly to cats, a cuddler, and licker. When it was just Jeremy, Zed, and me living in the tent, Zed would sleep curled against my belly, and I imagined him as my baby.
When I moved in with Tallulah in her LB apartment, Jeremy followed shortly after, and Tallulah was nervous to host Zed with her two cats. But Zed was really good with the cats, and she grew to love Zed. On our wedding day Zed walked with Orion and I down the aisle. Everyone thought it was rehearsed, but Zed just knew, knew that the day was something special, and when we got down to the stand, he stood post at Jeremy’s side. I cannot imagine the sense of loss Jeremy has; their bond was unbreakable. Every day with Zed was absolutely beautiful, full of love and care. He was an emotional support dog for me and kept me calm and supported while I went through hard times. He was an emotional support dog to Halaya as she transitioned into a new home with a new mother figure, and he was by Malakai’s side from the moment of birth. Zed went on lots of walks, he ate lots of good meat, and slept in our bed every night. I got to spend his last night with him against my belly; after we’ve gotten so far together, into a home, a family, our babies. Jeremy got to spend Zed’s last moments with him, watching the sunrise. I wish I could spend a million more nights with Zed, a million more walks, a million more face licks, but he’s in a better place, and I am grateful for the memories we had. I love you, Zed.
As Malakai gets older, more boundaries are set on how motherly I can be. From both of us. His constant reminders that he is not a baby while I’m trying to get him to sleep in his bed. The need to nurture and the reality that he can’t get everything he wants the moment he asks for it. In a way, things were easier when he was a baby. A time when he used to crawl around, take naps, and sleep wherever we put him. It’s silly, but our relationship is a catch-22, Malakai and I both want him to grow up and not be babied, while both of us are stuck from breaking away from the babying habits.
This year, we had a SpongeBob birthday. Krabby Patti wall streamer, featuring little paper and plastic jellyfish. The temporality of it all irks me. We would all have SpongeBob Birthdays after this if only the plastic decorations lasted more than one go. (Next time, I’ll get more sustainable decorations and switch my Tupperware from plastic to glass. I know these are the changes I need to make.) Water-themed tablecloth, with a net table runner. The fake tattoos and lollipops, all SpongeBob themed. It’s not that Malakai watches SpongeBob much, even though I’m sure he’s seen it before. We are just settling back from a family trip to Hawaii with my husband’s parents, so the theme of the ocean seemed to match.
Malakai went through his presents on his own time while waking up. He was less interested in the presents and more interested in relaxing on his day home from school. Each grandparent called him throughout the morning, and as he answered, they tried to tempt him to open their present sent in the mail, some in rectangular gift bags, others in Amazon sacks. Getting his attention wasn’t easy, but one grandma managed to coax him into opening her present. Malakai received Nerf guns, Legos, a Monster Truck, and some nice clothes. He played for a while before resorting to a screen.
At least until his best friend came over. It wasn’t an immediate excitement, like I’d like to type out. It started with him hiding, and then rejecting, and then finally wanting to show off all his toys and play. She announced, “He is Mountain Love! And I am Dennis.” I’m going to refer to her as Dennis. They ran around with the bug catcher and built their terrarium. Malakai was satisfied with just bugs, but Dennis decorated it with grass, leaves, and flowers. They jumped on the trampoline and practiced slamming down on their butts, running from soccer balls that dipped to them when they jumped, and crack-the-egg to see whose jump was stronger. We sat down at the table and enjoyed SpongeBob Pineapple sodas, along with brisket and chicken. Malakai’s dad came home right in time to sing Malakai Happy Birthday, and Malakai blew out the candles- all four.
The next morning, Malakai fought us to go to school. This is a regular morning routine where he doesn’t enjoy getting up and going to his daycare. Once he’s there, he always has fun, and when I pick him up, he is often very happy. I feel safe at the school he’s at, and I worry about the next step. I’m worried that he will fight even harder at a new school, which will make it harder for me to drop him off. When he fights me about going to school, I think of all the ways I can keep him home. What kind of work can I do while still giving him all the benefits of going to a school? In the long run, I’m going to have to let go, and again, the push and pull of not wanting him to grow up, and also being ready for him to grow up. The beautiful fours.
Do you have some leftover herbs and fruits from the holidays? I invite you to make a simmer pot with me. In these cold months, pagans may enjoy looking within for some shadow work, hibernating like the bear, and spending time with the people closest to them. There is a flip side to the cold, rain, and isolation; depression, unprocessed trauma, and loneliness may also bubble to the top. When these emotions hit home, it’s time to warm the house with an aromatic simmer pot.
What’s in a simmer pot, you ask? It is entirely up to the potter; you may find yourself mixing cranberries, cinnamon sticks, rosemary, pine, apples, oranges, lemons, roses, or bay leaves. Anything with a smell that is meaningful to you belongs in the pot.
Let’s make it!
Winter Solstice Simmer Pot: For Motivation, Connectivity, and Love
Ingredients:
6oz of fresh Cranberries
4 Tangerienes
3 Cinnamon Sticks
a bundle of dried Lavander
Fill water an inch away from the top of the pot. Boil water.
Cut up Tangeriences. Crush Lavander.
Add all ingredients to the pot. Set an intention with each ingredient. Oranges for inspiration. Lavender for comfort and friendship. Cinnamon for love and spice to life. Cranberries for family and (career/passion) goals.
Allow it to boil for five minutes.
Reduce heat to simmer for 4-6 hours.
When done, you may save the cinnamon sticks in a plastic bag and put them into the freezer for the next simmer pot.
I have found that this aroma therapy magick is good for getting yourself out of your head, easing depression, and strengthing motivation. The smell is relaxing. It benefits everyone inside the house, bringing them closer together and making them more aware of their senses. The simmer pot is an excellent use of herbs and fruit that are about to expire and can be thrown into the compost afterward. Feeling a little frisky? Try sipping your tea as long as you use all-natural edible ingredients.
Creature and Natascha sit in a home office in Eureka, CA after a craniosacral massage. Before the interview, Natascha relaxed into her second session with Creature full of powerful energy from the Hunter’s Moon. Natascha wanted to get to know this practice through the practitioner more thoroughly. Together they wrote down Creature’s bio and dove even deeper with a few interview questions. On the end of this post you can read Natascha’s experience during the massage and how she has benefited from Creature’s practice.
Natascha: Hello, welcome to the Little Lost Forest blog. Today we’re going to be interviewing Creature (they/ them) from Eureka, California, practicing massage, spiritual energy work and craniosacral therapy. It’s a beautiful cloudy October afternoon. Hello, Creature. How are you doing today?
Creature: I’m doing really well. I just gave a session not too long ago, and afterwards I feel very clean and clear and centered. Happy to be doing this with you.
Natascha: Thank you. And thank you for the craniosacral massage experience. I really appreciate that as well. What is your mission?
Creature: As far as this work goes, doing body work with people, it really is to offer what has been inherently bubbling up through me over the last decade.I’ve been getting nudges for a while now to offer healing work, and have been hesitant and insecure about it as I’ve been working through my ups and downs. I would say my mission is just to meet people where they’re at. I’m working with this concept of a mirror medicine and really just wanting to help folks get to an empowered state with themselves, with their body, mind, spirit. And I feel like I’m really just here to be a companion on that path for folks. I’m not here to heal anyone, but I’m just here to listen and respond and follow the lead of their own body and nervous system.
Natascha: Okay, thank you. What are your philosophies?
Creature: I would say that I walk a line between spirituality and politics. I don’t feel like they can be separated from me. In my own journey of healing has been very tied in with my identity as a queer and trans person, and also my journey of decolonizing as a white settler person. With those two realities, it’s also this experience of of neurodivergence that the more I embrace, I realize that I’m also embracing my healing gifts, and that being someone that doesn’t operate in dominant culture actually strengthens my role as a healer. It’s directly in opposition to a capitalist, patriarchal, society. And so I see healing and self-care and rest as resistance. And I also see the more that I let go of the expectations of what success looks like in this world, the more I listen to my inner guidance- that I have a lot more to give to other folks. So it’s really for me getting outside of my head and analytical mind and dropping more into trusting my intuition and trusting my energy and my body and my spirit and less of a like. Less of a, um, like I have. I have the answers or the tools to heal you. More like, um, something brought us together, and I’m here to be present and respond.
Natascha: How has plant medicine helped you on your spiritual journey?
Creature: Plant medicine has definitely helped me unlearn and unwind a lot. I was pretty naive and sheltered from a lot of the challenges of the world. Before I started working with plant medicine I was a big believer in college education and feeling like I needed to use that education to have upward mobility in society. But plant medicine really broke that down for me in big ways that that weren’t so much fun all the time. Now that I’ve managed to come through the… Dismembering, falling apart… I realize that there’s a lot more to me than I was aware of.
The plant medicine really helps me drop out of this analytical, judgmental state of mind that I inherited and helps me flow more, helps me dance with my reality. Helps, helps me with neuroplasticity. And was really a guiding force for me. Finding my inherent skills through my lineage that I wasn’t really aware of until I started working with plant medicine.
-Creature
Natascha: On a spiritual path, what does “doing the work” mean to you?
Creature: It means a lot of things. I think primarily it means being in my integrity, which is kind of a constant path of falling in and out of that and finding it again. There’s also lots of layers to that. I also think it’s interesting and funny that we use the word “work,” because I also like to think of it as play. It’s strange to use that word, but also, I think, good to reframe that word and take it back. There’s the work with myself and unlearning, decolonizing, returning to my integrity. Then there’s the play with with others and finding peers who are similarly on that path and learning to discern boundaries and who are healthy people to be around. When am I attracting unhealthy relationships with people? So definitely discernment is a big piece for me.
Natascha: Thank you for that. How does spirituality play a part in your massages?
Creature: I would say spirituality plays a part in most every part of it. Because in order to be present and open enough, I need to to to do the work to wind down and rest and not get all swirled up in the chaos around me. So it requires a certain preparation and lifestyle. I definitely am nowhere close to perfect in that and have my own, you know, struggles like anyone, my own addictions and coping mechanisms. But it requires me to to intentionally drop out of that and take take time to rest before and after. I experience my work as as being a channel of sorts. And so it requires that I have relationship with guides and ancestors, and that I have a practice that is familiar enough to step out of my conscious ego mind and listen and follow. And yeah, it’s, um, about recognizing the more than physical aspects of us our energy body, our emotional or spiritual body, and the many layers involved. It’s also pretty integral with the somatic quality of emotion and trauma and memory and Ancestral generational kinds of of ways that energy gets locked and trapped in our body. I guess beyond the physical layers of muscle and membrane and bones and structure of the body, everything else is entirely spiritual.
Natascha: Thank you. That’s really great to hear. How does self-care play a part?
Creature: It’s definitely essential. I struggle, you know, having regular routines sometimes deciding to commit more to this practice and this way of making a so-called career or identifying as a practitioner, um, was an impetus for me to take self-care more seriously and not put it on the back burner. Um, I spent a lot of time in fight or flight mode, you know, racing around feeling like I need to hustle in this capitalist world. And often self-care it takes a second or third or fourth and so on to all these other things that seem like a priority. This practice is teaching me that it’s actually a guiding force that once I do have a baseline of self-care that speaks to everything else that I do from that state. And and it adds to the quality of, of anything that I have to offer to the world. Whereas without that self-care, I’m more fumbling, agitated and not showing up at in as good a way as I could be.
Natascha: Who introduced you to Craniosacral practices and why did you start practicing?
Creature: Let’s see. I first encountered Craniosacral actually during ayahuasca retreat. I’d never experienced it before, but I was already struggling with, um, dysregulation from the medicine I wasn’t quite prepared for entering so quick and so deep. And there was a practitioner there who gave me some sessions that were really helpful. And since then, it’s been the primary type of therapy that has helped me integrate from my ou-of-body plant medicine trauma. And it’s also been really key to me healing some physical traumas. I have a brain injury, concussion from forest activism. And I’ve recently been able to integrate that more through craniosacral. Out of all the modalities that I’ve experienced, Craniosacral stands out as, it’s hard to compare with with other modalities because there is this there is this spiritual kind of trance state quality to it that. It rides the line between energy work and physical manipulation. I’ve been privileged to receive a couple practitioners really only want one practitioner consistently. It has been pretty inaccessible financially for me. So being able to study it in a beginner way has helped me have a relationship with that [Craniosacral therapy] and myself. So I do some of the work on myself sometimes, and I’ve even learned to, to just sense, the shifting and unwinding in my own body as I do my own meditation and self massage practice
Natascha: What can your clients expect to get out of a session? And what about multiple sessions?
Creature: A lot can happen in one session, but yeah, it’s really the multiple sessions that start to really, really ingrain and train the nervous system to do its own healing, but to keep that new shape and posture.
I would say in one session, it’s kind of like an introduction. It might be the first time ever or first time in a while that the body and nervous system has been reminded that it can adjust the way it’s holding, that it can relax on a deeper level. That it is safe to do so.
-Creature
I think it can be kind of- what’s the word?- It can be surprising to realize how much tension we’re holding and how much dysregulation we experience from the world, especially if we’re used to functioning at a pretty decent level. In my experience, I’ve spent a lot of the last decade very dysregulated, and so even one session can do a lot as far as just a little nudge or reminder that there is another way to be and exist. With multiple sessions, it’s just an opportunity to go deeper and to return to those places that we find the stillness that we’re seeking. It’s certainly not likely that after one session, we won’t just return to those old holding patterns that we’ve likely been familiar with most of our lives. So, each time we return and get that reminder, it’s more likely that we will be able to stay in those new shapes and those new postures and those new vibrations.
Natascha: Yeah. That’s great. What do you think while performing craniosacral therapy?
Creature: Oh, what do I think?
Natascha: What is going through the practitioner’s mind when they’re performing?
Creature: I would say very little. I mean, there’s definitely, um, moments where I’m wondering, like how how the client’s doing. Are they are they feeling this? Sometimes I’m like, “Oh, it’s just working.” You know, little mundane things like, you know, the temperature in the room or how much more time we have. But I would say the majority of the practice, I’m dropping out, out of thinking, and I’m going into a trance state. Um, that’s that’s familiar, you know, from plant medicine or being in ceremony where I fall into a mode with spirit more and I’m feeling the subtleties in the other person. And so my mind is going more into sensation and to feeling the depth of of tension and feeling all the knots and the twists and where those travel and almost just into my hands and not even in my head. So that’s part of why it’s so therapeutic for me as well because it allows me to step outside of that head space that our society teaches us to spend most of our time. It’s actually a huge gift to be able to drop into that state with other people because it does have a mirror effect for me, and it allows me to slow down. And I come out of a session feeling a lot more still and centered and whole then I feel most of the day when I’m not in a session with someone.
Natascha: That really resonates with me. When I got my massage, I’m much more in a state of meditation than I would be in a normal massage. So to think that you’re meditating to while I’m in this like, heightened state of meditation is just such a beautiful combination, like you said, a mirroring effect.
Creature: Yeah. It’s like like co-regulation kind of, you know, it’s that, you know, maybe someone’s coming in just regulated and I have probably some degree of dysregulation from being in the world. But the moment we like tune in there’s this balancing back and forth effect that starts to create this quality that allows for the healing process to unfold.
Natascha: How do you cleanse yourself from the client’s energy after a practice?
Creature: These are great questions. I mean, there’s ways that I do it during the session. The snapping is probably my favorite. Or just flicking the energy off. I can start to feel like pain build up in my arms if I’m, like, holding too much. And so I’ll just release that. I would say even just simple things like washing my hands, going outside and just kind of like opening up to earth energy. Yeah, just brushing myself off. Pretty pretty simple methods. I don’t really have like any sort of complex, wild way that I do that, but it’s definitely important. I definitely don’t like to go rush into something else and like to kind of take a good while to, um, just be in that state and not jump in a car or, you know, go out into, you know, go grocery shopping or something where it’s going to be overstimulating or dysregulating right away because, yeah, it’s important to feel. Let the process of returning to myself before what I might have to like accomplish for the rest of the day. But I would say like, oh, I forgot we had tea. Yeah, like tea or ingesting some sort of, like, gentle plant food. Eating is really good and helpful.
Natascha: Lovely. Where do you see yourself in the future?
Creature: Oh. Where do I see myself in the future? I see a lot of potential paths. I think the one consistent goal for me is to be on land. It’s really important for me to live with nature, live with the trees and the plants and have respite from the hustle and bustle of even a town like Eureka or Arcata. I am pretty sensitive and easily overstimulated, and this work only kind of heightens that, sometimes. It both heightens it and strengthens my capacity to have boundaries from a chaotic, frenetic energy. I really see myself living on land and having some semblance of community.
I really would like to be in alignment, in more solidarity with indigenous peoples and tribes and potentially working with food sovereignty projects and growing food and growing medicine, is really important to me.
-Creature
A lot is up in the air as far as, like how how those goals would work with a body work practice, but I’m staying open. I hope to be in a place where I am just living in reciprocity with with the land and with the people of that place.
Natascha: This is our last question. How has your healing journey positively affected your life?
Creature: My healing journey has positively affected my life just in the way that I can relate to people. I think I was pretty disconnected a lot of my life up into my 20s, and I didn’t really have a sense of purpose or understanding of the miracle of this planet that we live on. And so being able to have a personal living relationship with the earth, with trees and the plants and the animals and the other humans that relate in that way is immensely positive for me. Being able to feel connected to a lineage and like a way of existing before colonization is overall really positive. It’s it can be a challenge at times and has been fairly dark and self destructive for me at times. Just moving forward and continuing to find hope and find guidance has been able to pull me through that. And so now I feel like I have the life experience to to offer to other people, no matter where they are, on that non-linear path. And it just kind of imbues quality into most aspects of life. When I can see through that lens of, of spirit and the more than mundane reality before us it’s very easy to get weighed down by all the pressures of the world and all the toxicity of dominant culture and the ways that it seeps into communities that I’m a part of. When I returned to that simple path of just trusting what’s before me and not getting ahead of myself. Not getting too righteous about where we’re at as humans, then I’m able to, just slow down, sit back and have a more like. Just there’s a simplicity to life through that perspective that is really healing in its own right. I’m grateful for that.
Natascha: Well, thank you, Creature. Thank you for being vulnerable with us, for sharing your gifts, your service and your kindness. I really appreciate your time. I hope you have a wonderful night.
Creature: Yeahhhhhhh.
That was a lot of information for one blog post, but wait I’m not done. I want to share with you my experience with craniosacral massage. I found the results calming, my awareness heightened, and my body more capable of relaxing throughout the day.
My first session was very mesmerizing. I walked into the massage expecting a female’s presence and was happily surprised when my practitioner had the hands of a man. Relaxing on the table I started face forward. Again, I had these expectations that I would start on my back. When we began the massage there was a lot of focus on my head and face, something I had never expected before. As time went on, I noticed that I was becoming very relaxed. So relaxed, I almost fell asleep. Everything was so calming, I felt relaxed in places I didn’t know I had tension.
I think we spent a lot of time on just relaxing my mind and then body. It was like no massage I’ve ever had before. Pressure points were hit but it wasn’t the deep tissue massage I was used to, and I loved it. They flipped me over and massaged my back as well. When I came out of the massage I was beyond grateful for the experience. Even better later when I left the massage, I felt incredibly calmed, like someone had taken their time to feel my body and understand my body rather than mindlessly preform a service. This was like working with body and soul, not overlooking where the pain comes from but giving that pain attention and nurturing it’s needed to process and heal. Maybe that’s why they say they don’t do the healing but offer space for healing, I felt like my body for the first time in a long time could relax.
The second massage was after a stressful week. I was able to relax on the table, back up this time but I was not able to calm my mind. My rushing thoughts were on past and future but hardly focusing on the now. I wonder if this was because the intensive cranalsacral work that we did on the first massage was not the primary focus. This time I felt more energy shift, moving tension and emotion through the body. There was a point when I felt an intense pain in my shoulder I never felt before, not because of their touch but because like some stored trauma was raising to the service. This made me think that there is a lot more going on during Creature’s work than what’s on the surface.
Coming out of the massage I was very relaxed. My body felt great, and my mind was at ease. I felt like I trusted, bonded, and have achieved some kind of mental clarity with my practitioner. I also felt like some emotional wounds I was dealing with earlier on that week was processing. It makes me curious what multiple sessions would look like. What kind of person would I become if my body had time to process pain and emotion so that I didn’t store it in my body. I think I handled problems that arose afterwards with an honest and open hearted. More willing to go through arguments without getting heated. After I was able to relax into my bones. I really appreciate the work that Creature offers, and I look forward to working with them again in the future. I highly recommend trying carinal sacral massage and working with Creature if you want a safe, honest, and receptive light worker. It makes me wonder what I was really getting from the deep massages I’ve received over the years, was it healing my body or was it an instant gratification that wasn’t really allowing my body the time to rest, settle and reset.
Book your appointment today and get a 2 for 1 special: Creature (707) 572-7302
Sunday March 17, 2024. Natascha drove down to Red Bluff in Southern Humboldt County, with her father and son to meet up with Soulshine on their property to talk glass. Inspired by their work she had seen at Summer Arts and Music, as well as their last shop in Eureka, and their fun-ky Facebook podcast. Her quest was to find out ‘What’s next?’
Natascha: Thank you for meeting with me today. I’m Natascha from the Little Lost Forest blog. I’m excited to learn more about Soulshine and your new space here in Southern Humboldt. How are you guys doing today?
Ember: I’m doing awesome.
Willow: Yeah, we’re really, really enjoying this spring day.
Natascha: Ember and Willow, welcome back from Wisconsin. How was your trip?
Ember: We were in Wyoming. [They mentioned they did have a studio in the past in Wisconsin, Natascha messed up.] And the trip was awesome.
Willow: It was awesome. We were there for, like, six weeks.
Ember: We really enjoy going to different studios, which we got to do in Wyoming. We got to teach and help them develop classes and product and then we also got to blow glass of our own. So, it was just a really awesome situation. Sam and Alicia, they’re awesome people. We had a great time.
Natascha: That sounds like so much fun.
Ember: Hoping to do more with them in the future. So that’s kind of fun and exciting for us. So, moving in more than one direction. But at the same time, we’re going to get to blow glass, we’re going to get to teach. So, a couple of our passions.
Willow: Yeah. Lots of exciting things.
Natascha: Right on. I watched a video on your website. It mentioned that you’ve been blowing glass for 19 years. Is that still accurate?
Willow: Uh, I have been blowing glass since 1994. So, this is 30 years this year.
Natascha: Wow. Congratulations. Woohoo! How about you?
Ember: I’ve been blowing glass. I actually took glassblowing in college. I don’t know if I should even say what year it was. It was a very long time ago. But I also, at the same time, had three kids living on the mountain and really got into that for a while. And I think I’ve been back into glassblowing full-time since 2010.
Natascha: What’s your process like? Do you sketch out your artwork before creating it, or do you prefer to work spontaneously?
Willow: I think both. Sometimes you’re making things that have to fit in a box, because it’s an order for something. And other times you’re making things, where you have to share a vision with other artists and you have to be able to kind of have a plan for that. It can just flow as it go(es) kind of thing. But everybody needs to understand the same kind of end goal. So, that each person can find where they fit into that collaborative team. It’s hard to do that. You know, when you’re by yourself and you’re just going for it, making shit, then you can just be open and free.
Ember: I think that’s one of the things that you’re really good at is in a collaborative class teaching situation, you do, he does a great job at actually drawing out the plan, organizing people so that everybody’s got a part, and a job. And it’s kind of somewhat defined as- not as far as what artwork they’re doing, but where that part will be on the piece. And that, I think is a talent of yours. It’s super helpful in teaching and collaborating with other artists. Yeah.
Natascha: Lovely. Your artwork features brilliant and smooth colors. What’s your favorite palette to work with?
Willow: I think I have some crazy ideas. I think the best color palette we get are the ones where, uh, where I let Amber pick the colors.
Natascha: Ooh.
Willow: Wait, you know, not even that. I like when she just drives the ship. She’s like, this is what it’s gonna be. And I love it because then I…
Ember: We, like, you know, go back and forth, we go…
Willow: Back and forth like we always battle between; I like bold black line outlines, you know what I mean? Like, I like everything to look like a traditional tattoo, you know, with a really fat black outline and a bold image, like a sticker, like you would see a bright poster image.
Ember: I like all the colors between.
Willow: So, she wants it like, white and, like, she wants white in between every line.
Ember: I don’t just like white, I like all the colors!
Willow: And I want black in between every line. And so somewhere between white and black, you have to find a balance, you know. But as far as the colors together, I don’t really have a good sense of that. Like, she definitely influences that unless I know like I’m gonna do a fire water palette, but then I know. Well, all right, I’m gonna pick the fire colors and then the water colors and then- But otherwise if I don’t go with what she says…
Ember: I love color.
Willow: If I don’t go with what her plan is then…
Ember: -If it has purple and fuchsia. Yeah, right. You know, bright, beautiful green. Oh, yeah. Just the drippy, yummy stuff that just makes you want to kind of drool a little at the mouth and makes your eyes just kind of pop and your heart like, whoa.
Willow: You can’t argue with that. You gotta be like, fuck yeah, right. This is the perfect blend, right?
Ember: Throw some sparkles in there.
Willow: If it was up to me, it would be like; yeah, it’s black and white and purple and blue and yellow and green and like, holy shit balls. You know what I mean?
Ember: We have fun with color together. Yeah.
Natascha: I dig it. What is the learning process like for mastering glassblowing?
Willow: Hours is powers. [pause] It’s how you get to Carnegie Hall, right? You got too hours with powers, right? That’s the same thing. It’s like. Hours is powers. If you want to do anything. It’s not really about how talented you are or how smart you are, or how dumb you are or how cool you are, it’s about how much do you want to do that thing, and how much are you willing to dedicate your life to doing that thing.
Ember: So, passion, passion does come in there because hours, you still have to have passion for that medium. Uh, I like think about glass all the time and how much I actually love the medium. Like I was just, for some reason, thinking about it the other night. And I was thinking about how I look at it has changed over the years. And now, where at one time I was afraid, kind of, for when I’d get the glass so hot that it would just flow and move. Now I get off on that. I like, love it. I love how it gets so soft and movement and I can control and make the movement happen. It’s really symbiotic feeling. I love that feeling of symbiosis with the medium. I think that is really…
Willow: Yeah. It’s like an extension of your hand.
Ember: Or your whole body. More, more beyond that. Yeah. Your passion.
Natascha: What are some of the dangers and risks associated with glassblowing?
Willow: Uh, you get addicted to glassblowing. It’s just like.
Ember: It’s like it’s addicting.
Willow: Kind of like crack or heroin or any of those kinds of drugs, really.
Ember: Let’s refer to it as bitten by the glass bug. It’s a little bit nicer. It’s happier, I like it.
Willow: It’s really hard on your bank account. You gotta be dedicated and willing to bust your ass. And so, you gotta be willing to be rich, be poor, be rich, you’re poor, you’re rich, you’re really poor, you’re rich, you’re poor. And that’s like how it is. And if you’re lucky, there’s a you’re rich part that’s like enough to save enough money that you can, like, actually buy groceries. You know, like it’s a commitment that you’re like, this is what I’m gonna do. And some people, they just have another job and they just do that on the side. And those are some people that got a pretty good idea sometimes because it’s hard. It’s hard. And so, it’s hard on that. You know I don’t think like other risks. Like you’re not going to blow your ass up. Maybe. People get burned, but I, I think the pizza taking pizza out of the oven is way sketchier. I don’t know. I get a lot of little cuts that like, they’re just tiny little cuts, you know, but they’re in like a shitty spot and then you get them, like, all over, and then suddenly you have like 8 or 9 and you’re like, I have some kind of curse of the 10,000 cuts and these. That sucks really bad.
Ember: You know what? I get cut, I get burned, and I, I don’t know, it’s still like, somehow, I hardly even feel it. I just want to get back and do it more.
Willow: You get superpowers.
Ember: Yeah, yeah.
Willow: You just like, gotta push through it.
Ember: Yeah. I got the worst burn on my hand right here.
Willow: Oh yeah, that hot graphite.
Ember: I dropped a graphite tool. And I tried to catch it because I didn’t want it to break on the floor because, you know, they’re expensive.
Willow: It didn’t, it didn’t break.
Ember: It didn’t break, but it burned my hand pretty bad.
Willow: That graphite. Don’t fucking play. That graphite like, just fucking hurts.
Ember: But aloe is a wonderful thing. Aloe and a little lanacane.
Willow: And weed.
Ember: And weed.
Willow: I’ve heard, that weed is really good for that.
Ember: I don’t know.
Willow: I heard that, yeah.
Ember: I think so. I yeah, I smoked, I did try, I used it, it seemed to help.
Natascha: Talking about budgets, what aspects of glassblowing tends to be more expensive and are there ways for beginners to start on a budget?
Willow: Ooh, glass is expensive.
Willow: I think that (where) there is a will, there is a way. I think you can totally start on a budget. Willow will kind of say the opposite. He’s like, buy the giant torch, spend all the money right away. But I don’t feel that way. I feel like starting out at your comfortable spot and working your way that direction. Because even if you buy yourself a small torch, I think buying yourself the largest, the best, hottest, small torch or a torch that you can work with, I don’t know. You’ll have to get out there on the glass classifieds and look for somebody who’s no longer interested or upgrading. People upgrade all the time.
So starting out small with a torch that you can afford and working your way up. As you get better, you’ll be able to sell more things and put that money back into your glassblowing. Just like if you had any type of business or something passionate that you were about you would take whatever money came that way and put it back into it, you know? So, I think that is a really good thing to do with glassblowing because you can start out and if you’re really strong and passionate about doing this, you’re going to find a way and you’re going to make those really awesome pendants, those little things, those sculptures or those small pieces that make you happy. You’re going to go out there and you’re going to show them to people. You’re going to share your love, your passion for what you’ve made, and people are going to want part of that. And then you’re going to be able to build your kind of pocket full of things you can do, and that you have, you know, to get through life with. And put that back into your business and get more color, get a bigger torch, and keep moving forward. Because just like life glass is a journey.
Natascha: Wonderful. Can you share some advanced techniques that you guys have mastered?
Willow: We do a lot of sectional montage and linework techniques. Ember does a lot of incredible sculptural pieces that we bring together, like the two a lot, and that has been some of the best kind of things we’ve been doing lately.
Ember: Yeah, I love when we just, like, come up with an idea and I get to sculpt some amazing picture that came into my mind and make it three-dimensional out of glass. I love it. It’s amazing. And then we get to put that together with some amazing shapes that Willow comes up with color and we work together.
Willow (whispers): She picks the colors.
Ember: We do some awesome stuff together at the same time. Like, my love for glass doesn’t stop at lampworking. I really love working out of the furnace and making big pieces of glass work, which involves a lot of body movement. It’s a whole nother part of the medium. And it’s one of the awesome things about the medium is I feel like it’s endless learning. So, if you’re one of those people who likes to be challenged, you love learning. I feel like I could keep learning about different parts and areas of glass my whole life and still not feel like I’ve touched everything. So that’s exciting.
Natascha: Yeah, it’s humble coming from such a master. Super cool. Is it possible to accidentally burn the glass during the blowing process?
Ember: Mm mm. Interesting. Yes. Depending on the type of glass, you can.
Willow: You can boil the glass by heating it with two forceful and hot of a flame or whatever you’re heating it with at one time. And you’re blasting it so hard that the surface boils before the heat can radiate into the core of the piece, like thermodynamics. Right? It’s like a pot pie. It stays hot in the middle, and it cools from the outside, but it has to heat up the same way, because glass is an insulator and it’s going to pull its heat into the core. That’s what makes it gather into a round ball or something like that. And so any flame that you put to it, it’s gonna get hot and it’s gonna melt. But if you like, heat it on high, it’s gonna boil the rice, you know, and you don’t want to boil the rice, and you want to simmer the rice really slowly. And so when it can hold that water in and absorb that, you know, then you have that perfect rice. And it’s the same thing with the glass. It wants to be heated in the right kind of flame for the situation. Even different kinds of glass, different…
Willow: –colors.
Ember: Different colors. Yeah. Uh, have different chemicals or reactive properties that sometimes you want to boil. You want to boil the rice, sometimes a little bit that you get to break the rules or bend the rules. And then there’s other times that you want to like activate the system and you heat the glass and when you heat it, in a different kind of flame, different shit happens, you know what I mean?
Molecules inside the matrix get to float to the surface and create different colors or different effects. Right?
-Ember
Ember: Yeah.
Willow: Kind of like that.
Natascha: Yeah. That was a really good answer.
Willow: Is it too sciency?
Natascha: No, that was so cool.
Willow: Fucking science shit’s awesome.
Natascha: I think so too. Yeah. What’s your favorite type of piece to create?
Ember: I love creating sculptural pieces. I pretty much do a lot of sculptural pieces that I would want to put on functional pieces. And I do a lot of sculptural pieces. I like to make pendants so that people could wear them.
Natascha: What kind of themes do you like to use?
Ember: Um, mostly themes from nature. I love everything about the world in nature, and I love flowers, I love animals, I love trees, I love, yeah. And I actually get really inspired by colors of nature, I don’t know.
Natascha: How about you, Willow? Favorite type of piece to create?
Willow: I like to work with line work, and what that means is that I make a tube that’s a hollow tube but has like encased different colors all around it. So, it’s a lined tube that’s hollow. And I make that first, and then I pull that out, and when I pull it out, I get about four feet of that same color, really dense color, lined tube. And then I take that one piece and I rip it up into like 30 smaller pieces of line tubing, and then I twist them all together in different ways and then reassemble them back together in different ways often on like a 90 degree off-axis. And then there’s all this math that goes into it, and, uh, I get really into shape with the math formula of taking the spirals and stacking them together and reassembling the sections to make more patterns. And then if I make this many here and, you know, three, three, three, anyway, you know what I mean? It gets all mathy. But I like to create patterns like through that with the lines, by reassembling the lines and create really elegant forms. I think I really like extreme flat like transitions, you know, like, I don’t know, instead of slopey bubbles. I like to be, like, cut shapes. Yeah.
Natascha: Ember, now I hear what you mean about the shapes.
Willow: And it’s all math, though. That puts that back together again. That’s the… I don’t know, I sucked at math in school.
Natascha: I did too, I’m not good at math.
Ember: Math’s not my favorite thing at all.
Natascha: But now you’re using math in a different way and it is how you connect with it now.
Willow: That’s how I see math, I guess, all along.
They [teachers] didn’t show me that, like, hey, you can take a spiral and put three spirals together and it makes this other spiral.
-Willow
I’d be like, oh shit, there you go. I get the math. I’d have gotten an A. [laughter] They just didn’t teach me like that. They just taught me the other way. Yeah. You know they taught me the other math.
Natascha: And we talked a little bit about your inspirations being nature. Are there other inspirations that come through in your design work and your art?
Ember: I mean, if we’re going to do something like a collab piece, there’s different things that’ll create inspiration. If we’re going to do lighting for somebody’s house. Okay. I love doing that, too. [dream-like] What’s going to make their house look beautiful, you know? Yeah.
Willow: That’s always fun. Envisioning color palettes in lighting. They’re made in layers. So, we start with white on the inside, and then we put down other colors. And then we put down other colors over that. And then the light is inside shining out. So, you’re seeing that radiate out. So, you’re really seeing this like matrix of layers of glass and transparent colors over opaque colors over different other colors, you know, with spaces and gaps in between. So, you can create something that’s like, really cool and create a whole effect in somebody’s house. You know, I think that was really a fun thing to do. You can really, uh, really it ties the room together, you know?
Ember: Well, and it’s just also knowing you’re making this functional piece that’s going to be part of people’s lives every day and light their world… In glass it looks amazing.
Willow: Yeah, I love glass.
Willow: Um. Uh oh. I almost knocked the bong over.
Natascha: Before getting into glassblowing, what other forms of art were you guys involved in?
Ember: I think that I did all kinds of art growing up my whole life. My dad’s a really awesome artist and a painter and sculptor. And my mom had us involved in doing all kinds of arts and crafts. That’s how our family communicated. That’s how our family got along. I don’t know, I feel pretty blessed that was my world growing up, because I think that carries over into my life and my kids’ lives that I get to share that love with them. And I’ve always said if I wasn’t working in glass, I’d be working in another medium. Whatever’s available out there, I would grab and want to make stuff with it. So, I don’t know. I feel like I’m really blessed to get to work with glass, but also working with anything that’s out there in your world that you can see, like you can make art out of anything, everything. And that’s one of the amazing things about it, just go outside and look around you. If you can’t make it outside, look around your house, make art out of something you have. I, yeah, I think that I guess.
What did I do before? Let’s see before. Right before I got into glass, I was making jewelry using glass beads, and I was like, fuck, I want to make my own glass beads. I don’t want to use other people’s glass beads. These beads were from all over wherever, you know, and I wasn’t feeling conscious about that. I was like, I want to make my own glass jewelry with my own glass beads. So I took, uh, glass bead-making class in college. And back then, I mean, there wasn’t hardly any glass classes or anything hardly going on. It was like, uh, this couple came over. He had designed some, like, head for the map gas. And we all, like, used map gas to make beads. And we stuck them in vermiculite and, um.
Willow: Low tech.
Ember: Very, very low tech. So that’s why when people say, oh, I don’t have enough money to set up a situation to blow glass, I kind of feel like, just like that. Go back to that first time that I blew glass, and, it took nothing; but it took a metal rod, some bead release, some vermiculite and a metal bucket and a little Mapp gas with an airhead on it and I made glass beads. And that’s because I think that there’s that whole situation. If you really want to do it, don’t wait, don’t wait till you have that big, thick thing of money. Don’t wait. Take that little bit and start and let it grow.
Ember: Crazy.
Natascha: Cool. So, do you guys sell your artwork in Wyoming as well?
Willow: Yes, we did.
Natascha: Are there other locations where you guys display your art?
Willow: Let’s see, we have our artwork at Ph Glass, Plaid Hemp Company. They have five locations in Wyoming. You can buy some of our functional pieces and we sell our other work. On our Facebook page or off of our Instagram.
Ember: Yeah. I have a proto line that I’ve sold to different shops.
Ember: They have 19 stores throughout Washington and Oregon. Ash Denton has some of my pieces he picked up at Vegas.
Willow: Xhale City. They have 29 stores in Georgia, and they have a bunch of our glass.
Ember: So, I think it’s all over the place. It’s all over.
Willow: But if you want, like, you can just hit us up in the DMs. That’s what the kids say. Yeah. And we’ll be happy to make something for anybody. And we’re almost ready to have people out taking classes.
Ember: Yeah. And we’re happy to start doing custom orders.
Willow: Custom orders, all this stuff.
Ember: And we should be doing classes, hopefully. You know, I think it’s going to take us probably another few weeks. 3 or 4 weeks, I would say. And then we can maybe start doing class. Actually depends on the weather. If we get a lot of rain, it might be too muddy. But if the weather stays gorgeous like this. Yeah, that’ll be amazing.
Willow: If it dries out a little bit. It’ll be perfect.
Ember: But eventually that’s our big plan, you know, that we see in our future is being able to set this place up so people can come out here. We especially want to start a community out here where maybe we’re working with underprivileged youth and kids at risk and being able to have kids out here where they can be part of nature, relax and maybe get in touch with their spiritually motivated passions, and art forms that we can see all around us. And being able to share that with them and hopefully get them in the glass shop, experiencing that as a medium. One of the things I love about it is that we can make it super fun, super simple. You don’t have to play the concert right off. You know, you can make some just really happy, fun things that just bring you joy. And I want to share that with people.
Natascha: I love your passion for the community. Right on. You kind of talked about this, but I recall your previous location in Old Town, Eureka. It was a glass shop with a studio in the back. What motivated you guys to move into this current space?
Ember: We’ve always had this dream about having Glass Camp, so we had that place in our studio over there in Eureka for ten years, and it was an awesome spot. We’re super, proud of everything that we got to do there and make happen, and all the classes and people that came through. We still feel really connected to that. But also at the same time, after the ten years we were there we felt like we could offer more. I think that us having this dream of Glass Camp and still sharing our passion when this place came up and was offered, we thought this was just the best place to grow a glass camp because it’s beautiful. It’s really not that far outside of many towns around here. We’re 20 minutes from Fortuna. We’re still only 40 minutes from the old glass shop. All that’s going to happen is you’re going to come out here instead of the place in town, you’re going to breathe fresh air. You’re going to relax and I feel like you’re just going to be able to get more in touch with that artist side of yourself, you know? And I don’t know, for me, I think it’s just bringing that good quality to life, to ourselves, our friends, our family, and sharing it with the community.
Natascha: You have the Eel River right here in the backyard?
Willow & Ember: Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Willow: We got riverfront.
Ember: In the summer. We’re hoping to make a path down to the river. People can picnic, you know, and enjoy the water.
Willow: There’s kind of a path now.
Ember: We’re working on it a little.
Natascha: I admire how you’re growing everything from the bottom up. It’s too cool.
Willow: We were when we got here. It was like camping. We were camping here. It was. It was crazy.
Ember: Yeah, it was awesome.
Natascha: Can you give me a verbal visualization of what the new studio space might look like.
Willow: Oh, let’s see, right now it’s a 46-foot by 8.5ft wide. Refrigerated Safeway semi-trailer truck. Awesome, right? So, we put the shop in there. It’s ugly too, by the way. It is not a pretty one.
Ember: We’re gonna paint it.
Willow: She’s ugly, but you gotta have the vision. The current state on the outside is like, wow, that truck’s seen some miles, right?
Ember: We’re taking artistic designs right now for the outside of the truck. You never know. It could be like some amazing mural that we’re gonna put on there. That’s magic.
Willow: That’s exactly. The vision inside of there is, the very back is like a co-working room where we can do lapidary and polishing and cold cutting with the saw and all that kind of stuff. Ventilated, separate back area. And then there’s a spot where Ember’s torch and my torch are right together in there. And then there’s a spot where the lathe will go right next to that. And then after that, it’s kind of like another [Marvin. Leave her alone. (Talking about the dog)] Another long table where we’re going to have room for classes up to four people at a time. And then after that, on the end is hippie Chris. He has his spot right there. And so, there’s another side of the shop [Ember: That, Dave’s in there], and Dave’s in there as well with his torch.
Ember: We’re gonna bump it out…
Willow: We’re bumping it. Right. So that’s all on one side of the truck on the other side is pretty much an open wall, except we have our color rack somewhere in there, but we don’t know exactly where it goes. But we just got a sliding glass door that’s seven feet wide by 80in tall. So that’s pretty fucking tall, right? And it’s a sliding glass door. [Talking about the dog: Marvin. No, Marvin. He’s really. He’s really. Yeah. He likes people.] Uh, anyway, uh, yeah, it’s seven feet, seven feet wide. We got this big ass sliding glass door. And then, uh, right next to that, we have this other giant windows like we have in our house there, that eight foot wide by 2.5ft tall windows. We’re gonna put that right in next to it. And so we’re gonna then build a deck out there. But we have two trucks, right. You can’t see the other one. We have another one that was a Salvation Army, donation truck. She’s 32ft. That one actually has paperwork, man. It’s a pretty fucking nice truck.
Ember: We had a way to drive it. We could take it places. She’s a pretty nice truck. That’s part of a dream further down the line, now that…
Willow: -Now that the rain is over. Right. So, like, what we’ll do is where they’re at. They’re just parked parallel to each other. But we’re gonna move the salvation truck out of the way, take the big truck and slide it down like 10 or 20- as many 20fts as we can do down that way. And then we’re gonna turn the Salvation Army truck the other way. So it’s back end is like that, and it makes like a L or a T or wherever the fuck it fits. Right. And then…
Ember: –we can have a nice big deck.
Willow: Now we’re in that L pocket, we can hang out.
Ember: People can even hang out and watch glass blowing through the big sliding glass door or window.
Willow: Yeah, with the deck outside it.
Ember: You know, people want to go out and smoke. You can still watch us. You can still gather out there, create a really nice space.
Willow: With like a covered area. So that way people have an outdoor (area). Even in the winter, it might be pretty cool. And then we could even have an entrance into the other truck from the other side of the alley, you know. But they’re still trucks, so they’re temporary and they’re on wheels, and the decks won’t be attached to the buildings. They’ll be two inches apart.
Ember: Right next to it.
Willow: So, they’re temporary. And the county, you know, we’ll follow all the county guidelines because we’re like in a floodplain. So, we can’t like do build like that. We’ve had to kind of figure out all these other ways what’s allowed, what’s not allowed. We wanted…
Ember: -we wanted creativity.
Willow: …shipping containers, and then have an upstairs and all that. But then the county was like, no, you can’t have shipping containers. So, we had to get rid of our shipping containers. And then we got-
Ember: I know we’re lucky they took them back.
Willow: -semi trucks- I know.
Ember: We bought them locally, luckily. We wouldn’t have been able to do that if we bought them you know (big corp)…
Willow: And the people were super cool. They helped us find the semi-truck.
Willow: And the truck driver guy. He even went and got the semi-truck trailers and brought them here for us in the rain. And it was like right when the trucker parade was, yeah, Kenny, Kenny Howard, he’s awesome. And Travis and Cousin Travis, they both had an excavator and a semi-truck, and they got this.
Ember: They got the big rig stuff.
Willow: Yeah, they brought them in here and it was already Mud City. And Kenny got his big-
Ember: They moved our houses.
Willow: Yeah, they moved our houses. We couldn’t be over there because of the neighbors. So, Travis has, like, a big thing with a flatbed that moves, and we cut our houses in half because now they’re ten by 12, so they’re 120ft² under. You know, you guys can’t be over 120ft² without a permit.
Natascha: So, you’re following all the rules.
Willow: We cut them in half. Now we have 220ft². And Travis is awesome [Ember: I know]. He brought them all the way over here and put them back on the pure blocks.
Ember: Anyway, the shop’s going to be awesome when we get it together. Yeah, but it’s-
Willow: But it’s on wheels.
Natascha: It’s a party I wanted to attend. That sounds really cool.
Ember: Yeah, yeah. We’re gonna have little Christmas lights. It’s gonna be really nice.
Natascha: Does Soulshine have a motto or a guiding principle?
Willow: Oh, she’s got all those. You got all the good ones. Be the ripple. Uh, what was your?
Ember: Be the ripple.
Willow: Let your soul shine.
Ember: Why dream small when you can dream big? Yeah. And it’s I don’t know if you know. Remember, I don’t know. We have a lot of, um.
Ember + Willow: Lot of them. Shoot.
Willow: Stay lit.
Ember + Willow: Stay.
Willow: Stay lit, folks.
Ember: Yeah.
And, you know, don’t settle for the life that you have.
-Ember
If you don’t love it, you know, that’s part of dreaming big. What is the best vision of your life that you can envision? And when you see that, follow it, find that, follow it and don’t give it up. Just keep that in your vision. And I believe that it will keep unfolding in every, every fold that happens is like another part of that. So, you can see it. You can see it happening, you can see how close it is. Just wait. It will keep getting closer. And the other part of that is, is that’s going to keep changing. Just staying fluid in your art and staying fluid in your life and not just sticking to one thing, because there’s going to be times when you need those other things that you know and have learned and experienced or want to. Being able to stay fluid makes those new places happen.
Natascha: Those words resonate with me. Can you share some of the challenges you face in the glassblowing process or even within the business?
Willow: Glassblowing is just part of the business. Everybody thinks, oh, if I could learn to blow glass and I could learn to do this technique or make that kind of product, I could just be rich or I could make it and be successful. But really you have to be smart. You got to be a business person first. The glassblowing part is important and is why you do it. It’s what you’re passionate about, but it’s not what makes it happen.
You know what makes it happen is being a smart business person and knowing how to market yourself.
-Willow
Uh, a great artist with a shitty marketing department is not going to make it or is not going to really make it, you know, in any kind of way that’s able to put the kids through college and pay their bills. But crappy artists with a great marketing department and a really good photographer are gonna go far, you know, it’s just the way it is. And so, you have to find balance in what you want your life to be, or else you have to have good partners or friends or whatever to handle. You have to have a team, you know what I mean? And that takes different kind of business sense.
Ember + Willow: It’s hard.
Ember: It’s a hard job being an artist. You have to have a lot of hats.
Ember + Willow: There’s a lot of-
Ember: Hats, a lot of hats to wear.
Willow: A lot of pieces to the pie that all have to be able to come together – where the rubber meets the road, you know what I mean? Like, can you buy food? Can you buy gas? Can you live a way that you feel like you’re comfortable, whatever that level is that you need? You know, like I’ve seen artists find all those things. Like everybody, it’s different for every person. Some people just want to go out in the garage and make cool things and be inspired, because it doesn’t matter who you are, whether you’ve had a 30-minute marble-making class and you’re sitting there on the torch staring at that fire, trying to keep the little ball of goo from falling on the table or whatever the fuck. Or you’ve been doing it for 30 years and ten-million hours behind the torch or behind the fire in some way or another. That experience that high, that whatever- Like that experience. That ride is the same thing. That’s the same rush, that’s the same euphoria or catharsis or whatever.
I was having a really shitty day. I was really depressed. And then all of a sudden I, like, juggled the ball of goo and I can’t even remember why I was upset. And now I’m just like, whoa, look, I didn’t drop the ball of goo, right? And it’s like, it’s so simple, you know what I mean? But, like, it doesn’t matter why you blow glass or why you do that. Because if you juggle the ball of goo, you’re gonna feel that kind of experience. And it’s always the same. And I think that’s pretty cool. It transcends- glassblowing is like a staircase. Everybody’s on the staircase. Some people just started moving up before you. And some people do it every day for ten hours a day. And some people do it once a week or once a month, and everybody’s on that staircase. But everybody’s like, feeling that same feeling every time they go up the next step. Right? That same rush, that same, it’s fucking amazing. That’s if you can find a way to do that and pay your fucking rent, drop the mic right there. And it takes a lot. It takes a lot, I think. I think it’s like that with any art though. You can’t just expect because you can make cool art, that you’re gonna be able to sell it and make a living. And I’m gonna have a nice house and a picket fence, and their dog’s gonna be cute, and everything’s gonna be cool, you know what I mean? Like, yeah, I think that’s a great idea.
Natascha: It’s hard.
Ember: That’s just a fairy tale thing. Yeah, you know, it is. Life is hard work. If you really, really want something and it’s worth having, then you have to work a little bit for it. Yeah, maybe you have to work really hard for it and you-
Willow: –gotta keep working.
Ember: And maybe you have to work harder than you’ve ever worked in your whole life, but eventually you’ll get past that and it’s worth all that hard work.
Willow: And then you might have to start.
Natascha: I saw that when I met you guy. You put a lot of work into your relationship and into your art and to your business, and I see that.
Willow: It’s pretty amazing. You gotta really want something really bad. You know? You gotta really want something.
Ember: I think it takes that to make it through like those hard times, you know?
Willow: That’s the secret sauce right there. You just gotta really, really want that super bad and just do whatever it takes every day. You know, the successful artists aren’t the one that make a really badass piece of art. You go to like, the, we go to Glass Vegas, right? This big boiler silicate flameworking show all the big artists, everybody, all the everybody’s there. Big guys, small guys, famous guys, every guy, every guy, every girl, every amazing glass artist that’s in the scene. They’re all there. And there’s like a whole area in the beginning when you walk in with all this crazy ass amazing stuff, you’re like, holy fucking shit, right? Blows you away. And the best artists aren’t the ones that can make something like that. The best artists, the ones that can, like, make something and then on Monday morning, go back in the studio and make something again. And then in the morning, go back in the studio and make something again. And you know what I mean? Like, that’s what makes it, your ability to make art and then go back again and make something again. Whether it’s like coming up with another incredible idea that you’re passionate about for a whole new project that you’re gonna start all over again or what?
Ember: That’s where the whole world and whole community of glass comes in. I think that there’s many cogs on the wheel that in, like, art, it’s not one way, it’s not one person. It’s many ideas and many people and all of them are valid, and all of them have value and are amazing because, like, some of those big art pieces are truly, truly works of art. That person had a vision and they probably drew it out and they got together with multiple people and they made that dream happen. They made that come true. And so when we do go to that place in World Cup of Champions and of glass, you know, anywhere, and there’s so many of them, you know, in different types of glass. Yeah. Uh, admiration and, you know. No thought of you know what, what does that person actually do to make their money? I’ve just, like, in awe of, uh, how somebody can just dream their dream and make it in their medium. And it’s a piece of beauty that just makes me feel inspiration to be able to make people feel that and everyone gets to admire that. I think that’s what keeps helping them push us all forward in our medium. Wherever you’re at, if you’re wanting to just do proto if you want to do, you know, big art pieces or you just want to do your little thing. Either way, that inspiration of what can be is out there for us to see. And that’s what keeps pushing our community of borrow glass workers forward. It keeps pushing not just our artists, but it also keeps pushing, more than that; our tools, our colors, it all keeps moving forward, you know, and that is fucking community of glass. That is not just one person, not ten. It’s a huge worldwide community. And it is amazing.
Ember + Willow: Yeah.
Ember: Magic. There’s magic.
Natascha: You really hit my next question on the head, I was going to ask about the glassblowing community. Is there anything you wanted to add about the glassblowing community to help somebody that’s not in it, understand what that community looks like?
Ember + Willow: Mhm. Ah.
Willow: I think there’s a lot of people that see people from the outside looking in in the beginning, like artists that have been successful for a long period of time. And they seem to set wierd milestones based on what they see from artists who maybe have been doing it for 40,000 hours of time. And here somebody starts something and they have a good talent, but they get frustrated because they can’t compete with somebody that has 40,000 hours of practice ahead of you. And so I think that there’s a lot of like highs and lows in setting realistic expectations. Like if you want to blow glass to make money, you could blow glass for about three weeks. Learn like a set few things like how to make a little pendant, how to make a little marble, how to make a little league, you know, doodly bopper. And like, you could open up a pendant marble doodly bopper fucking mega domain on the internet and pay your kid’s college education, right? If you want to blow glass because you’re passionate about it, you just want to learn and grow and improve, and you don’t set those kinds of barriers to your own learning in front of you, then it’s a better ride. You know what I mean? Like, I don’t know, uh, because I think, I think a lot of people, they just see, like, all these things, I want to be able to do this or I want to be able to do that, and that’s all cool. You could do that and you could maybe make money doing that. But you can also do these really easy this, this, this and this make a bunch of money and then you can pay and afford to be able to do whatever your heart (desires).
Ember + Willow: Yeah.
Ember: Because all those little things are your practice. Yeah. Those are your small practice. It’s like your small meditation every day. That really comfortable zone where you’re like relaxed, you’re comfortable, and meditation starts happening. It’s that way for the glass when you’re starting, and it’s just comfortable with that small pendant and doing it again and again and again. And pretty soon meditation is happening and you’re not really thinking about so much what you’re doing. You’re just-
Willow: –just meditating. Meditating is huge. Breathing is-
Ember + Willow: -big.
Willow: Breathing with the glass.
I think once the glass starts moving, learning to time your rhythmic breathing in with the glass as you’re working, I find is really important for me, breathing through it.
-Willow
Otherwise, I notice I’m like getting really into something and I’m holding my breath and I’m like. And I’m tense and my shoulders are turning and my arms are working and my neck is tense as fuck. All in this contorted, really weird position. Or maybe I’m trying to use gravity in different ways, so I’m contorting my body and all kinds of angles in order to push the glass one way or the other. And if I don’t breathe out, I’m like, otherwise, I’m holding my breath and gritting my teeth and it’s-
Ember: Like, you don’t breathe, you could faint.
Willow: Yeah, you could go down. You saw that one go down. That guy go down one time. But he was kind of a dick.
Ember: Oh, yeah.
Willow: That guy went down anyway.
Ember + Willow: Wasn’t breathing.
Willow: No, he just was holding his breath. It got too hot. He was kind of a jerk. So, it happened.
Ember: Too many heats.
Ember: But that was in the, uh, in-
Willow: the hot shot. It was really hot that day.
Willow: Anyway.
Willow: We tried to tell him to breathe.
Ember + Willow: Shit.
Natascha: I think you got a full circle around the community. Thank you. [laughter] Yeah.
Willow: The glass community is all different people, though. There’s a lot of different people. There’s so many kinds of glass. There’s a million different…
Ember + Willow: -directions.
Willow: You can go. And each one involves a very deep fucking rabbit hole that you could suck you in for your whole life. Each one. Or you could pull out and say, I’m gonna be the jack of all trades, and I’m gonna, like, go down this rabbit hole and this one and this one, and then I’m gonna start combining rabbit holes together.
Ember: I’m a rabbit.
Willow: And so, it just depends on how many rabbit holes you want to go down. But there’s a different community for every rabbit hole. And then there’s a bigger, broader community of glass, and then there’s a bigger, broader community. It just depends on what you’re looking for. Some people just want to hang out in their garage and make cool shit. They’re gonna get the same high as the other people. Whatever you’re looking for in life, if you just look for it.
Ember: It’s a big community of people who are just people. Yeah, just like when you go out in the world, you’re going to meet all kinds of people. It’s like that in the glass community.
Willow: Yeah.
Willow: Not everybody likes licorice. Some people like licorice. They really like licorice.
[Natascha looks really confused]
Ember: You gotta think about that one.
Natascha: As talented of artists, as you guys are yourselves. Are there any other artists you particularly admire in this trade?
Ember: I’ve, I personally, girl fan out on some female glassblowers because it’s a male-dominated medium.
Willow: It is definitely a boys club.
Ember: I’ve noticed throughout the time I’ve been with glass that it is a boy’s club. It’s hard to even get in. It’s hard to even learn as a female glassblower. It’s getting, it’s changing and it’s changed, I think, a lot in the last ten years. But before then, it’s been really difficult for female glassblowers to not only be respected, that’s been lacking and still does in our community, but also sharing is different. Sometimes a lot of guys get together and, you know, maybe they can communicate together, but communicating with, uh, female that you’re kind of sometimes not in the big circle of, of everything. And so that’s been, I think, really challenging. As a female glassblower, I enjoy teaching because I want other women who have experienced that to experience more freedom. I want female community glassblowers to share. I would like to see there be more of a female glassblowing presence together and stronger. And there is that small group, but it’s really like a part of a little bit of a, you know, echelon group, which are, you know, people that I fan out on. So, you know, it’s okay.
Natascha: Can you name a few (female glassblowers)?
Ember: I really love Windstar. I, right now, I hope I don’t slaughter her name, Sibelley. She hasn’t been blowing glass very long, but she was able to move really far in the glass world. And I admire that about her. And I like that she’s moved around a lot, and she’s doing well. And she recently got a job teaching at Corning. And, fuck, I think it’s amazing. And she’s pretty young also. All different glass of flowers that I, like, admire. I love Kelly Howard, who has the Lincoln City glassblowing place right there in Oregon. I love what she did, and I love that she is a female glassblower. It’s fucking empowering.
Natascha: Okay. We only have one more question and this is the silliest. This is the one that I came up with last night before I printed everything and drove out. So, this one’s just for fun. If you see a shift of consciousness already happening in our world, what is it?
Ember: Uh, shift of consciousness is, I see it as a change in community. I think people are moving into from a physical community to an online communities. And so, I worry about the importance of being- eye contact, one-on-one, the importance of touch, the importance of hug, the importance of knowing people, truly knowing them. Because when we sit across from each other and this one-on-one, or even multiples, when we sit across from each other and we talk and we communicate and we share, we get to share so much more. We’re not only using our voice and our ears, but we’re also using what body language people use. The eye contact, just even the vibe, the feel, the energy that moves between us all; life, everything is energy. And I worry about us missing that. And that’s part of us wanting to have a community space and glass that we get to share. And, you know, we’re like- really- open to having all kinds of art and artists also sharing. So, you know, it moves beyond in creating more of that one-on-one community with each other. I think there’s a reason why we move in and out of each other’s lives. I think noticing the importance of that and the value in that, I think creates a bigger and better love for the community and each other. And I think that that’s what’s starting to move out of us all. And I don’t want that.
Natascha: Beautiful. Anything to add? Hello? Nope. It’s okay. You don’t have to.
Ember: What are we talking about again?
Natascha: The shift in consciousness.
Willow: Well, I think people are waking up. Some people are waking up and other people are resisting because their focus is maybe not ready for change, but I think there’s a lot of people waking up. I think there’s a lot of big things that are going to happen. And I think. Yeah. You got to be a warrior, though. This is great weed, right?
Natascha: Yes.
Ember: Maybe you’re in for the long haul, but that the part that really is, is not, not that you’d be at war, but that you be at peace. That you be at love, that you be open. Yeah. That you be open to the universe. To be open to love, share love, give love. One fucking smile can change somebody’s life in one moment. In one moment, that person could have needed that. Just one small gift didn’t cost you a penny, but you gave it and they respond back. Man, you know you did something. You know you changed something. The energy of that one person, they give back to you when they notice that your energy, you vibe, that energy, I don’t know. But the energy of being in touch with that energy of us all being together. That buzz, that fucking beehive.
Willow: What she said. Yeah.
Ember: Love, love.
Natascha: Well, thank you so much, Soulshine, for offering me your time, trusting me with your space, and sitting down for this interview. I hope that the Humboldt County community gets some really great information from this. And thank you to everyone who comes to visit my blog.
When my husband was working, I remember telling him that I missed going to work and getting time away from the house. Now that the cards have turned, I would give anything to quit my jobs, drive my kids to their events, and be at the teacher-parent conferences. In a snap, all the responsibilities I had taken for granted now are my husband’s.
As a nonworking parent, it’s easy to say, “I work full time too, as a parent,” which is apprehensible. Yet, the working parent doesn’t get noticed for the long hours away from the kids, creating new working relationships with coworkers and clients that aren’t nearly as meaningful as a relationship with their children.
What does doubles look like? That’s what my girlfriend texted me today, trying to squeeze in some connecting time. Doubles to me looks like getting ready for work at 6 am. 5 days a week, I put my dreads up into a bun. I take the kids to school at 7:45 am and begin work at the schools by 8:15 am. As a substitute teacher, I’m on call, but as the winter months have come, the need for a substitute is so great that they can book me weeks in advance. Lately, I’ll have the month booked prior to the first.
So, I go teach at a school with new-to-me office personnel and principals, with new students and teacher’s aids. I do my best, which is usually appreciated, and then jump into my car at 3 pm. Lately, I’ve been working in high schools, with developmentally challenged children, and my usual K-8th. I enjoy all my jobs. I like impacting my community, even if it’s a different community every day.
Then at 3 pm I jump into my car and drive home. In between shifts, my husband can find my doubles frustrating. He might not always support me in the way that I would want him to. For example, sometimes, he wants attention instead of just giving me time with the kids. This, in turn, frustrates me and can create problems.
So I get home and spend 30-45 minutes watching TV with the kids, reading Malakai a book, and asking Halaya how school was. At 4 pm, I start getting ready to go to work. After I shower, change my clothing, and do some makeup, I put my hair back into a bun and put a net on it. I’ve noticed some intense neck pain with the dreads and having them pilled up on the top of my head, all day, but they are symbolic to me, a marking of when I became pregnant and had Malakai, similar to how my partner’s dreads mark Halaya’s conception. I leave fifteen minutes before my shift every day. I either walk and calm my mind during this time or spend ten minutes in my car in front of the restaurant playing Lily’s Garden on my phone.
So far, I’ve always been on time for work, besides once when I thought I started work at 5 and not 4 (that’s on Sundays only.) When I go to work, I begin a set routine. I always fill the chocolates that go with the receipts before I clock in. Then I walk toward the kitchen, pounding fists with the server I’m relieving and saying “Hola” to the staff in the kitchen. I clock in and begin with the bar, taking the same steps every day unless the other server gets to work before me; in that case, he will start with the bar. I get to choose the light color that lights up the liquor. The other server said he never put the light on in the past, so I got the privilege. I choose the color that matches my mood for the day, not that anyone notices. Something about this rhythm of doing things in the exact order helps me balance my full day’s worth of work. If I perform these steps, everything will be okay, and nothing will be forgotten.
When it comes to customers at Chapala’s, everyone is nice. The staff is friendly, and the customers are lovely. I am fortunate with this job. I don’t make the tips I would in San Diego, but I make enough to pay my bills and take my daughter to do something fun on the weekends. While I’m waitressing, somebody might take offense if I try to crack a joke or say anything that’s not in line with what I say to almost every table. It’s the world we live in today. Dry or dark humor is not often appreciated, so I just kind of do this step-by-step process.
Chapala always gives me a shift meal. This is my first time working at a restaurant that gives a waitperson a shift meal. I appreciate this because not being hangry is essential to me. So I always accept this meal. I feel healthy in general, eating Mexican food almost every night. I mostly get salads, but rice and beans, meat, and some sauce are better for you than people may make it out to be. So when I close Chapala, it’s never the worst day of my life, well besides when my friend died, but I asked to go home early that day, and they understood. This place is one of the best restaurants I’ve ever worked in.
So I get some days off, right? Well, I’m trying to run this small business. I need to make products and content and create a community with the business you’re reading this blog from right now. So, a lot of times, I come home, and I can’t even be present. I go down to Scotia on Fridays (I’m off from the restaurant Fridays and Saturdays) and read Tarot cards. I love reading Tarot cards. I love connecting with my community and guiding them through the cards. I’m very blessed to have this opportunity. Every other Friday, I go from my Tarot readings to the Explore Your Shadow acrylic expression class I teach at the Children’s Cottage. Most Saturdays and Sundays, I vend. I vend all over Humboldt County, and Little Lost Forest is growing in its presence in the community. But to answer the question I do get holidays off, off from the restauarant and from the schools. These days are not meant for cooking.
So when is enough, enough? Well, the more people I talk to, the more I hear, “I worked doubles and triples in my thirties.” I guess, this is the grind yet here I am having dreams where I’m screaming “I quit!” I envision myself leaving the restaurant in January. This will be a hard pull because restaurant money is quick money, and umbrellas the funding for my small business and pays the bills. I foresee Orion and I traveling to Renaissance Festivals next year to do the wand workshop and sell witchcraft goods. I envision myself attending grad school for writing, influenced by history and art. I would love to get a remote job where I work from home as a personal assistant. I can take substitute teaching jobs as I wish. Orion and I also make baked goods, which I sell at the Children’s Cottage. I dream of marketing this better online.
Next year, I foresee myself going to Germany to see my grandfather’s grave. A loss that I took hard over the summer. And most of all, I see myself spending more time with my kids next year. Without the restaurant job, I will get afternoons with my kids. Teaching occasionally instead of five days a week will allow me to grow my business. The new year is right around the corner. I’m going to keep my head down and grind it out, knowing that nothing is forever.
Natascha: Hello. You’ve made it to the Little Lost Forest blog. Today I’m going to be interviewing Jonathan, a Kambo practitioner. After doing my third session of Kambo. Hi, Jonathan. Thank you so much for our session.
Jonathan: Thanks, Natasha. I really appreciate you having me on here today.
Natascha: How are you feeling?
Jonathan: I’m feeling great. I’m feeling good. Nice and grounded.
Natascha: I’m just going to ask you a few quick questions. What inspired you to offer Kambo ceremonies?
Jonathan: Yeah. Beautiful. So. I’ve been an advocate and a body worker and a coach for transformational practices for ten, fifteen plus years. And so, in my experience, when I when I come across a modality or a transformational practice, something that really transforms and causes a huge shift in my energy and in my life, it’s made me really inspired to go study those modalities and then offer them as sacred service to the world as my passion and as my service, my sacred service. So in terms of the Kambo, it’s a heart medicine and it really recalibrates the heart, much like Kundalini yoga and breathwork and those types of things. The Kambo, after the first time I did it, I could really feel the medicine working, you know, physically, emotionally, spiritually, working on many, many different levels to cut cords, cut energetic hooks and cords of things that were not really serving my highest consciousness and my highest evolution. And what really inspired me about this medicine is it’s a fire medicine, and I’m a fiery being and use fire as my element. So that was really inspiring and also as well a non-psychedelic. So psychedelics are great and I’ve really enjoyed using them in my life, yet they’re not the end all, be all. And ideally psychedelics in a way they take us out of our body. And so where I’m at in my life now, I want to be in my body. I want to be quick and strong and fast and embodied in my body. The Kambo [makes shooo sound] drops us directly into an embodied state of self, of groundedness, strength in a really practical and applicable way. So. So that’s really what that’s really what what drew me in to the Kambo was just firsthand experience of a complete shift. A catalyst may have you in my own spiritual growth.
Natascha: Thank you so much for your service. What led you on your spiritual path?
Jonathan: What has led me, just in general?
Natascha: What was the beginning that began seeking out?
Jonathan: The beginning of my spiritual path. Yeah. The beginning of my spiritual path was was nature. So excuse me. I draw a lot of inspiration and power and vitality and reflection and meaning. Just from nature, just from the beauty, the reflection, the immersing my my soul and spirit in nature. And so growing up, I didn’t I wasn’t like an iPhone generation baby, thank God. And, you know, AOL was just like dial up internet and all the things. So anyway, I wasn’t a tech kid. And my parents. Did a lot of camping with me and my brother and sailing and fishing. And so I grew up in a nature based reality. Thankfully, my parents shared the same values and they bestowed those, those values onto me.
Natascha: What unique insights has this path given you?
Jonathan: The path of nature?
Natascha: The path of spiritual awareness.
Jonathan: The path of spiritual awareness. Unique insights. Wow! Hmm.
Jonathan: Well, I would say, you know, studying Buddhism and whatnot in college, just the ephemeral nature of all things, the fact that everything is in a way, temporary. So that includes our pain, that includes our suffering, that also includes our joy, our gratitude, the higher vibratory states bliss that we that the brain really seeks us to experience. But there is a certain. Acceptance. I think that comes with the realization that everything is impermanent. So it brings us what does it bring? It brings us into present awareness that if we’re having a hard day, if we’re having a hard feeling, a hard emotion, that this too shall pass. So really it’s a liberating. It’s a liberating thing for me.
Natascha: And that’s beautiful. In your experience, how has Kambo enhanced your clients lives?
Jonathan: Yeah. Great question. Well, I mean, the Kambo has, as I mentioned before, it’s a it’s a heart medicine and it recalibrates the heart to the heartbeat of the universe and to the heartbeat of the earth. And I think when people come and see me, they come and see me for a variety of different reasons. Candida, depression, addiction. Some people just want to like, supercharge their immune system and not get Covid or something like that. I think that that the Kambo, is a very powerful catalyst for change, and it shows us the areas of our lives where that need attention. And then it asks us, it also shows us what our fears are. In life, everyone has fears, so it shows us these fears in a very real and palpable way. And then it asks us to summon the courage to overcome those adversities and those challenges. And so, in a way, when any individual does their work, when they do the work to change, when they do the work to shift, to transform, to uplift their life, to uplevel their consciousness. Then everybody wins. Then all of the collective consciousness is raised because that individual is choosing to do their medicine work. So I think the Kambo has really been really profound for a lot of people with heart blockages, you know, because a lot of people have been hurt. They’re carrying trauma, PTSD. Some of it’s from this lifetime, some of it’s from ancestral previous lifetimes. And, you know, until that stuff is really looked at and healed, it can be really difficult to move forward in life in a clear and in a purposeful way. And so the the Kambo can really show us our trauma and help us to overcome it.
Natascha: What does the Caboclo inoculation offer?
Jonathan: Yeah. So the Caboclo Inoculation is a modern-day take on taking three sessions of Kambo within a 28-day lunar cycle. So the Caboclo people are a tribe of indigenous that live in Brazil and they left the Amazon to come out into the cities. So they started this tradition with Kambo. And the idea behind it is that Kambo works accumulatively in the system to detox the body, spirit and mind. And so if you do one session, if you do another session shortly thereafter, it’s going to go a little bit deeper and then it’s going to go a little bit deeper. So much in the way that sometimes, you know, an ayahuasca ceremony, if there’s a two-night ceremony, the first night is about working through energetic congestion. That’s maybe outside the energy field or right on the edge of the energy field. And then the next night, the medicine moves more, more inward to the physical because it’s already cleared out the energy, the energetic realm. So in the same way Kambo is, is similar. That way, every time that you take Kambo, you’re flooding your body with beneficial bio peptides, which are short chain amino acids which do an amazing job at detoxing the cells, and also causing white blood cells on the liver to start rapidly, rapidly producing. This in turn greatly enhances the immune system of the body.
Natascha: Where do you where do you see yourself in the future?
Jonathan: [laughs] Yeah great question. Well, I see a family in my future and I see it just continuing to be an educator and a teacher of Kundalini yoga and also retreats like that’s been like a big calling for me for, for many years is how to create and market and successfully pull off. Transformational, immersive retreats where people come and have an amazing experience with nature, food, all these things that are medicines, right? Nature as medicine, food as medicine, breathing, breathwork, yoga, alignments and perhaps Kambo as well. So all the different heart medicines. So that’s what I would love. That’s what I am creating. It’s what I’m working on and would also get me out of Humboldt in the wintertime, which would be lovely.
Natascha: Thank you Jonathan, for sharing your knowledge and watching over me and giving me the medicine. I really appreciate you and thank you to everyone that reads the blog.
Jonathan: Yeah, thanks a lot Natascha. That was that was really a beautiful transformation to witness. So, thanks for showing up for yourself when you do your work. When you win, I win. We all win. We’re all here to do our work. And so, we’re up leveling humanity one day at a time.
Natascha: So true.
My voice was frail during that interview. I had just finished my third Kambo session, which meant twenty to thirty minutes of intense purging and detoxing. I followed up that session by going to work with frog (swollen) lips. So, let’s get into this, shall we?
What made me take Kambo? I saw the Kambo sessions marketed on a signal group called “What’s going on?” An Arcata-based group. A friend had told me she was into trying it perhaps two years ago. She mentioned they take an incense stick and some medicine and go through an experience. I think this is all she told me. After my sessions, when I told her I had done the Kambo, she said she hadn’t tried it yet. So, I had very little knowledge of Kambo. I don’t even think I researched it before my first session. I knew it would be healing. I was smoking mole bowls (a mix of tobacco and marijuana in a bong) at the time, a nasty habit I had been exposed to in my college years in San Francisco, and I set the intention to stop smoking moles. This was my intention. I had a quick orientation over the phone with Jonathan, agreed to a donation, and met up a few days later in Arcata to a quaint healing facility. He recommended three days of a vegetarian diet prior to the Kambo session and that we do not drink any water for eight hours prior to the session. I went upstairs into a flat with a waiting area, bathroom, kitchen, and two rooms.
I did a group session, and we were asked to bring two liters of water, a pillow, and a yoga mat. I laid out my yoga mat in front of Jonathan, who sat on his knees next to a drum and a ceremonial serving tray. On the tray was a small statue of a green frog. Another woman joined us. He asked us if we wanted an alignment, and taking turns, he took us to the other room to give us one. By the end of the alphabiotic alignment, he said something along the lines of how your legs are now equal lengths. It felt great, and I’m generally scared of any alignment work.
He had the other woman and myself speak about our intentions, and then we began the ceremony. We saged one another, washing away bad energy. Jonathan chanted and then started by thanking the directions, the participants, and the medicine, and intensively bringing awareness and appreciation to the indigenous of the Amazon and Brazil who had taught this practice. He awoke our higher consciousness and spoke of the sun’s power, burning within our hearts. He called in our ancestors. He asked for there to be a physical reaction that would tell us when they had landed. I had an incredible shift at this moment, calling on the help of my ancestors and feeling their presence with me in the room. After this meditation, he asked us how much medicine we wanted to take. He said, “Think of it like you are doing any entheogen. Do you like to microdose, or are you a heavy doser?” He suggested the most we take during our first session was five. The lady beside me decided on four, even though she said she would usually dose lightly, and I went for five. Jonathan began to burn a coal incense. With a knife, he scrapped off the medicine from a wood stick that came out of a wooden box. The medicine was clear with a slight tint of yellow. He placed the doses onto a quartz crystal. Then he showed us the patterns the burns would be in. I chose a straight-line pattern. Than he asked where we would like the burns placed. The traditional way was for women to get it on the inside of their ankles and men on their triceps. I decided to do it on the backside of my heart, next to the spine. He told me this is a very powerful place to put the medicine. He then burned small dots into my back with an incense stick in a line.
I opted to go first, sitting upright (like he instructed) on my yoga mat in front of an empty bucket. I began drinking the water. Jonathan drummed as I drank and drank. I drank so much water it came up, and I thought I had already taken the medicine. He told me to keep drinking, and I did, and then he asked if I was ready to take the medicine. At this point, I had already spat out water. He then placed the five doses onto my back. I could feel the medicine on my back. I could feel the medicine like a rush inside my body. I didn’t know what to expect. I wasn’t tripping, but I was hyper-aware of my body. A few minutes went by, and it wasn’t so bad. Ten minutes later, I started to feel nauseous. I began to purge, and I purged a lot. Twenty minutes, maybe thirty, after he wiped the medicine off and began a ritual with the lady next to me. I felt hungover, but I was no longer purging. Afterward, I was glad I had followed through with my goal and sent a picture of my frog lips to my friend.
Immediately after my session, I had no cravings for alcohol, tobacco, or cannabis. My liver seemed rejuvenated, and my mind was clear, like my third eye had opened, and I could see things for what they were.
The following day, I questioned myself. I no longer craved to drink, but why would I want to stop drinking? This wasn’t my intention going into Kambo. I like drinking; it helps me manage my stress, and I have fun with my friends when I drink. Then I thought of all the goals I set out when I was a young adult: I wanted to write a book, do animation, and, most of all, sail the world. Before taking the Kambo, I had fallen into a depression. I told my partner, “I no longer see a future. All the goals I have ever had seem to be distant memories now.” So when I started questioning myself why I wouldn’t want to drink, these thoughts came up, and I told myself that I wanted to see a future again where I’m alive when my kids are old and happy with my partner. I want to see a future where all my dreams come true, and I have worked hard to achieve them. Most of all, I thought, I want to be my best self for my children so they can have a mommy who is present with them and not intoxicated. With these thoughts, I knew I had to contact Jonathan again and tell him I was ready to continue on my path of Kambo by completing the Caboclo Inoculation.
The next session was done a week later. He drove me to the beach, where we sat in a ceremony in a secluded dune. This time, I intended to feed my creativity, become a writer and an artist, and fulfill my goals. Again, I drank the water to his chants, and he placed the medicine in a line on my back—this time, I did seven hits. A beautiful image came to me, one where I was in a prayer pose, and a deer with antlers was over my head, birds and butterflies were coming off my arms, mushrooms, and flowers supported me on the ground, and the frog was in front of me. An elderly male to the left of my head and an elderly female to the right were there to help me get through my processing. When the medicine hit me, I pucked into the sand in agony. I moved away from the watery vomit and rolled in the sand, trying to find comfort in the earth. Jonathan directed me to breathe to try and soothe the sensations. In twenty minutes, he wiped off the medicine, and the ceremony came to a closure.
After my second session, I went to an EDM show with my best friend at Blue Lake Casino. I drank NA drinks and danced all night. My energy and personality wasn’t less of from being sober. We had a blast.
In my third Kambo session, I asked myself why am I even doing this again. I’m putting my body through agony, and even though I feel great after, the purging process is so intense; why would I do this to myself? We completed the ceremony, and I left feeling like, well like a frog. (Did you know frogs only jump forward? Not backward?)
During the time of taking Kambo, I had distanced myself from my partner. I felt he needed to be more supportive of me taking on the role of a breadwinner, working long shifts, and not getting the time I craved with my kids. After my third session, I was able to communicate differently with him. I didn’t give him what he wanted to make peace. Instead, I told him what I needed to feel fulfilled and supported. This is straightforward advice to give someone, but doing it can be hard when you feel stuck in routine, and your partner won’t listen to you. I starved him of my attention until he would listen, and when he was ready to listen, I didn’t let him fall back into routine. I asked for the things I needed: time with the kids, time with him, and to be non-competitive with chores and daily practices. Our business has taken off since my Kambo sessions. I feel like Kambo helped me achieve these things, and I hope I can continue moving forward with a clear mind to reach more of the goals I have set out.
As you may have heard, I have started teaching Acrylic Expression classes at Willow’s in Eureka. This is an all age class where we talk about our shadows and it’s relationship to art. Our shadow is the part of us that we deny attention, rather we be ashamed, or not ready to face that the ego isn’t always as perfect as it makes it’s self out to be. Many times the community asks me, where do you get inspiration for your art? And my answer is through meditation. When I sit in meditation I am able to conceptualize things clearly and then I take those ideas and I use them in my artwork. In this class we begin introductions with a tarot reading. Everyone chooses a card and relates that card to their lives, without knowing anything about tarot. You may be surprised how much the imagery makes strong suggestions to what the tarot card means, but almost always the newcomer is able to relate the card to it’s intended meaning.
Next we sit (or lay) in a 30min-1hour meditation. During this meditation I guide my participants to the otherworld, but first we thank our directions and ourselves for showing up. When were in the other world I create a safe space that is different for each participant. Once that safe space is created we face our shadow selves, this can be negative traits of ours, problems we may be facing day to day, or with other people. We confront this shadow, talk with it, accept it and then let it pass. Then we return to the safe place and take note of all the details within it. Throughout this experience we draw inspiration to paint in our art session. When the participants wake up from the session we go into an art lesson. The themes are posted on the flier. Our first theme was Light and Shadow. I am going to post the lesson plans on here so you can do this guided lesson at home. Feel free to leave me a tip through the link to my etsy store. If you prefer a video I have also linked a video to my youtube channel so you can participate in the guided meditation at home.
Why do I put these lessons up for free? The class may never come up again in the same manner. These classes are experiences that are unique each and every session. I can’t promise that one session will be just like the other. To get the full experience it is highly recommended that you come to class in person. The classes structure will change after the series is done, next I would like to do a class targeted to pregnant moms, and new moms so they can explore their unconscious reactions to motherhood and paint it on canvas.
For this class we offer high quality, golden paints, a small canvas, a journal that you can take notes on, sketch paper and drawing tools, as well as cookies, and beverages.
This class takes place every other week. Below is the flier. Thank you for reading and I hope to see you in class.
Light and Shadow
6:15pm Introduction
Introduce class, who I am, the shadow and light physically and metaphysically and its relationship to self.
Introductions, Names, what brings you to art class today, What inspires you? What are you working on?
Talk about safe space, letting people speak, and not sharing other people’s stories outside of class.
6:30pm Lesson
Ask we progress through this lesson sketching is encouraged.
There is no light without shadow and no psychic wholeness without imperfection. -Carl Jung
The shadow is everything which one has no wish to be. -After Skool
Persona, social mask. Taboo to talk about our hardships and failures. hiding behind the persona.
The shadow is limitations, biases, fears, traumas, oppressed fears, and untapped potential.
The shadow is often seen in dreams. When the shadow is confronted, we can understand our potential and ideal self.
Similar to the Ying and Yang, we need both the light and the shadow to make a whole.
The shadow is seen as the enemy when really it is knowing what bad one is capable of. The shadow only gets hostile when it is ignored or misunderstood.
If working with a partner, set your intention on your relationship with that person; if you are on your own, focus that energy on your own lights and shadows.
Go over Light and Shadow and what that means to you. The shadow self. How our art doesn’t always come out the way we expect it.
Meditation: 7:00 pm
Deep Breathing Meditation
Something that brings us light.
Something that takes us into the shadow.
Imagine the color of light brought to you.
Imagine the shadow color you hide in the box.
Behind every negative action is a positive intent.
Look for the positive intent and reframe it to yourself as an adult. Heal it and acknowledge it so you can move forward.
The inner child but not limited to, lacks needs and has scars. Or at any point in life, these traumas could have occurred.
Rewrite your perception, I have become successful because of these traumas.
Drawn to the light what color do you see? What is the light? What do you see?
Now hidden in a chest is another color is illuminating from inside. When you open it what do you see?
Now, these two images draw them together in the shape of a Yin and yang.
Talk about what the colors are and the things and what this may represent to you.
How can I redirect the darkness to support the light?
Confront your dark side.
Light From Above
Average Light
Half Tone Light
Average Shadow
Cast shadows- an object casts a shadow: will shadow adjust to object form shades.
Form Shadows- When planes turn away from the light. The shape is determined by the curve of the shape.
Halftone- Inbetween light and shadow. Control the halftone by choosing colors closer to the average light.
Pick two colors on your palette paper. Blend the colors slowly into one another. Also, make a line to depicting colors from white to dark. See how they correspond on the color wheel. Use only these two colors for your painting.
7:30pm Start Painting
Shadows are darker or lighter than light? Darker obviously
So remember shadows are darker than lights…
Talk about your painting.
8:20 Accept and Redirect
You can’t be in acceptance and resistance at the same time. Truly accept your circumstances in the now. This can pertain to the painting, and this can pertain to real life. Your worst nightmare can no longer be your worst nightmare if you accept it. By accepting this fault you are no longer feeding into resistance.
Perceive how the mishap is a blessing in disguise. We write the narrative of the mishap to paint a brighter future that makes you unique because of your experiences.
Narrow down how to make your future goal meet your needs and discard the situations that no longer serve you.
The end of the school semester came in June, which meant a break from substitute teaching for me, and the beginning of summer. My daughter’s previous teacher and good friend forwarded me the “Call to Artist” by the Festival of Dreams in the Lost Coast Outpost. They were giving out $40,000 of art grants up to $2,500/ ea. The gears of my imagination pushed forward.
The event’s theme was the Wigi, the Wiyot name for the Humboldt Bay. I was inspired to combine my job as a substitute teacher and my passion as an artist to come up with the Wigi Dome, An Educational type of Magic.
What is the Wigi Dome?
The Wigi Dome is a 19×18′ tent that can fit about 13 people, funded by the City of Eureka for the Festival of Dreams. For the event, Fun Facts were lined outside the tent made by second and third-grade students from Laurel Tree Elementary in Arcata. On the top of the canopy, local artists spray painted with water-based acrylic on cloth panels to represent different times of the day and places of the Manila Dunes. Artist such Gizmo (@neudepths), Jackie (@jackalope_studios_arts) and Joe Fox, Ruth (@ruthcreaates_4), and Amber (@mushroom.firy.logs), Autumn, Sera and Georgia.
The newly created event is Festival of Dreams – a collaboration between the North Coast Repertory Theatre (NCRT), Ink People Center for the Arts and the City of Eureka. The festival will happen in two parts: an outdoor event Aug. 18 through 20 that will take place at Halvorsen Park and around Old Town, and an indoor festival on Oct. 5 through 8, that will be held throughout multiple different Eureka venues. And to make this new festival even more exciting, the City has made more than $40,000 in American Rescue Plan Act (ARPA) grant money available to fund local artists who want to participate.
The festival Started on August 25th as a parade danced through Old Town. Local businesses allowed performing artists to set a stage in their occupancy, including Eagle House and Eptimony Gallery.
Saturday’s event took place in Halvorsen Park as the free interactive art festival commenced. There was a beer garden, vendors, and lots of interactive art. Perhaps you found yourself lounging in the Do Nothing’s Societies Oasis (@thedonothingsociety), hanging out with flow artist Zephyr, making your own tarot cards, and eating complimentary fruit. Enter the Kaleidoscope airplane or sit at a table at the Clam Juice, a psychedelic experience (@glittergizzard). Beautiful fabric acro dancers from Synapsis performed in the center of the park. You may have wandered into a forest of pom poms or the dream-like fabric maze. You step into the photo booth and allow its mechanics to hand draw your photo (@aart.by.mir). Live music and a late-night DJ rocked the stage. In the amphitheater, an artist hung a lanyard of butter wrappers painted with unique images. Ceramic artist Josh Roller (@darthgritty) displayed abstract creatures and wall hangers along the stone edges, along with a smoking dragon, a bone and metal sculpture, and much more art surrounding the amphitheater.
How was the Wigi Dome experience at the Festival of Dreams?
The Wigi Dome offered tea and art by Erica Brooks (@fineartbyerica), Joe Mallory (@joemalloryart), Ruth Murphy (@ruthiecreates_4), Drake Munson (@draykinarts), Natascha, and Jeremy Pearson (@littlelostforestart). 10% of all paintings sold inside the dome go to Friends of the Dunes to restore Manilla. Kris Coffman (@kriscoffmaninsight) spoke on Love and Communication with an intimate group that shared stories, laughter, tears, and animal noises. Rah Kiv (@rahkiv) played Flamenco R&B to set the mood as the vendors finished setting up and the festival began. Ruth, vocalist, and Uncle Steve, violinist (@unclesteve1352) performed sea shanty and folk music throughout the day. I made a Wigi mix that was Lofi Hop and had the sounds of the animals of the bay mixed in for in-between sets. Stories on Humboldt County were shared within the Wigi Dome between our community and collaborators, along with discussions, lessons, and music. I ended Saturday night with Alien Paintings, where we free-painted on canvas, folded the cloth in half, and opened it with a groovy alien design. On both days, Jackie (@jackalope_studio_arts) spent a few hours painting fish ceramics with “kids of all ages.” Autumn was an active emotional support partner throughout the festival.
At the Welcome table, we gave out an educational pamphlet by K-12 Educator Crystal Linde about the Wigi, The Wiyot name for Humboldt Bay. We also asked our guests to write an Orison (a 13th-century word for a prayer) for the Wigi. Here is what our community had to say:
We appreciate all the effort that went into the Festival of Dreams. The coordinators, staff, and volunteers. Along with all the other artists that participated. It was truly a beautiful experience to hold space in an interactive art installation to teach our community, hold space for discussion, and supportive relaxation. Thank you to all the Wigi Dome collaborators, artists, musicians, historians, businesses, volunteers, and community guests.
The Wigi Dome doesn’t end at the Festival of Dreams. On September 9th the Wigi Dome will have a booth at Recovery Happens. Autumn and Natascha collaborated on a small interactive art piece where we will ask the community to write on a leaf, What in their life is worth living for and clip it onto the tree. I dream of displaying this place at Morris Grave. We will also be exhibiting the Wigi prayers at the booth. In the future, I can see further collaborations with educators, community, and artists and bring this project to schools to educate our youth in an interactive manner.
Little Lost Forest 